fortlauderdale1984
On August 16th my cat Scotch passed away from a stroke. My better half was home with him during the incident and tried to save his life by rushing him to the vet, but he was gone on arrival. I had him cremated which was a complete nightmare because they brought him back in an urn that looked like a garbage can. We had to put him in a new urn and that made this grief even worse, because seeing his little bones in ash form made me meltdown on the floor. I have pictures of him everywhere and I cannot move forward with my life, I am writing this while on vacation and I cannot focus on this trip. I don't care about anything or anyone, I barely care about going to work or washing my hair. I have no family and Scotch was my only family that I had, he was more than a cat, he was my rock. His sweet purr and loving personality got me through every day and I was whole. Scotches passing literally broke my brain and I have lost all of my desire to even do basic things such as paying bills, running errands and being around my better half in fear that my grief will bring him down. I saw my doctor recently and recommended counseling, but I cannot afford to pay for it. I am asking if this is normal to feel this way for so long and to lose interest in basic things, I literally have days where I don't care if I live or die. Thank you for listening.
Quote 0 0
Sayuri
I am so sorry for the loss of your little Baby. Many say it will get easier with time. It's been almost six weeks for me and my guilt it's just as it was after my baby died at the hospital. I will never forgive myself, never should've left her. I have started writing a journal telling her I miss her and ask for forgiveness. It helps. I have been told our furbabies send us signs, so I also look for signs like feathers and dragonflies. I have started praying again because at times the pain is so overwhelming, I need help. I have five other dogs, so I have to be here for them. Best regards
Quote 0 0
BorderCollieLover
fortlauderdale1984:

So sorry to hear about passing of your beloved  Scotch. Everyone reading this can relate to your pain. I think you did a very wise thing by joining this Forum. We are all experiencing the exact same thing. We all welcome you - when you feel like it - to post in this Forum and let us know your thoughts and feelings. It can be helpful and make the grieving process  a little less bumpy. There a lot of wonderful, pet-loving people here on this Forum who want to hear from you. You are not alone. 

Jim
Jim Miller
Quote 0 0
Becky1990
Fortlauderdale 1984,
I am so sorry for the loss of your furbaby Scotch. He is a beautiful boy. My 1st cat in the early 90's was that color too and was the sweetest boy ever.
What you are feeling is very normal and unfortunately the greiving process takes a long time. They were are rocks, soulmate, and gave us unconditional love that some people will never experience. Try not to focus on other peoples feelings. You have to work on your own. I lost my kitty of 19 years, 20 days ago. Tomorrow will be three weeks and it feels like an eternity. But what has helped me tremendously was being here and writing my feelings out. We all here understand your pain and are here for you. You are not alone. Please keep sharing here and let us know how you are doing. Big hugs.
Quote 0 0
fortlauderdale1984
Thank you everyone for your support, I feel a lot better knowing that what I'm feeling is normal. I was starting to get concerned that I needed medical intervention. You are all in my thoughts and prayers and I am so grateful I found this forum.

Sincerely,
Stephanie
Quote 0 0
Eileennellie
I'm so sorry for the loss of Scotch. I also lost my kitty, Mr. Puffy, to a stroke. I also rushed him to the vet, made it in three minutes, but I knew I lost him on the way. The way you feel is 100% normal. Some people have a harder (or easier) time dealing with loss, but it is all normal. And it does get better. I woke up crying for a few days, and cried whenever I thought of him for months, but now I am ok. It has been three years. It's hard to carry on like normal, doing basic life stuff, but keep trying and one day it will start getting better, and will continue to over time.
Quote 0 0
Gingers_Mommy
@ fortlauderdale1984

I'm sorry for your loss. What you're feeling is normal. You lost your fur baby. I too lost my cat Ginger a few days ago and I'm devastated by her loss. I have lost my appetite too. Seeing your picture of Scotch caused fresh tears as his fur coloring reminded me of my cat Ginger. The pain is raw. Posting these feelings helps to process them. Thank you for sharing what you're going through. It's important to know that we're not alone and that others understand the pain bcs unfortunately they're experiencing it too.
Quote 0 0
Stealthcat
Fortlauderdale1984,

I am so sorry to hear about your cat. I am right there with you. I lost my Stealth on 9/21/2019. I am still sort of on auto-pilot, unable to do/enjoy some basic things that i used to. I discussed getting counseling with my husband because the grief has been so intense. I don't think you are abnormal for feeling the way you do.  And we all understand the bond and strong connection to our furry family members here. I hope you'll continue to use this forum as you need/want to, and that we can somehow convert the longing/pain/loss in our heart to just fond memories instead. I think we all sought out this forum for the same reason, unfortunately, but writing out your feelings/thoughts is immensely helpful, as was knowing that we are all in this together. 
Quote 0 0
Memories_of_Marmalade


Dear Stephanie, 

I am going back and reading older posts here on the forum. I am very sorry to learn of your loss of your beloved "Scotch." I too had an orange Tabby cat and he was the love and the light of my life. His name was Marmalade and he also had a stroke (during a surgical procedure for a Tom-Cat fight injury.) I can totally relate to how you feel. My World was and remains completely turned upside down. I miss my lad so much.

Marmalade was the only entity in my life that I could still trust. He never lied to me, used me, betrayed me, ran from or abandoned me. He was true and loyal. Loving and kind. He was my son, my brother, my comrade in arms. We had a mutual admiration society that consisted of only he and I. And we liked it that way.

One night I thought I was having a heart attack while laying down, and I actually smiled to myself, realizing that I was not going to call 911 and I might pass. That is how much I adored and missed my Marmalade. I am 5 months 1 week into my grief. It does change as so many post here on the forum. But I realize that my life will never be the same. It will make my death that much easier when the time comes, except than who will remember my Marmalade when I am gone? As long as I continue to live, he will continue to be remembered. I can still look at photos and videos of him and talk to his spirit, which I do each morning, during the day and at night before I go to sleep.

The cedar box that contains his ashes is the last thing I look at each night when I tell him goodnight and the first thing I look at in the morning when I tell him good morning. It comforts me to know that all living things on Earth are made up of 4 billion year old stardust carbon, which our cats were also made up of. And Marmalade's (and Scotch's) ashes contain stardust. How fitting, as our boys were like shooting stars in our lives.

Kind regards,
James
Quote 0 0