I haven’t posted in awhile. It has been 2 months. I’m not crying as much but there are still random moments where I cry super hard and can’t stop. I’ve been busy with college. I transferred to a new university. It is my junior year in college. I feel so much pressure and I am still mourning for the loss of my beautiful Yuki.It’s been 4 months since I lost my sweet Yuki to a tragic accident. It still hurts so much. I still think about how I wish could have done things differently and if I did Yuki would still be here. The heart ache is unbearable. I just want to scream and let everything out until I can’t scream anymore. His 4th birthday was on November 15. I cried a lot leading up to his bday and on the day of I cried super hard. Since then, I don’t cry as much like I said earlier. I think about Yuki everyday and how much I wish here was here. I would do anything to have him back in my arms. Whenever I see Facebook memories and google photo memories, I always get sad because it is always pictures of Yuki.
The year is about to end. I’m dreading it because once 2020 hits, I feel like I’m leaving Yuki behind. It hurts so much. I can’t stop thinking about it that way. I just feel like I would be leaving him behind once 2019 is over. He is supposed to be here. He was so young. He was supposed to grow up with my younger siblings and I. It’s so unfair.
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kmayo99 - 2 months is not a long time; I know it still hurts so much. I lost my special cat Sammi a little over 2 months ago and I still cry almost every day. I can look at pictures of him at this point, although not for long.

You must be really busy with school, and at the same time, I understand how it's hard to be completely distracted when your life has been so altered by the loss of Yuki. He was a beautiful little boy, and I know he left a huge hole in your heart.

Please know that you're not alone in your grief, and if posting here is a comfort, continue to do so. We all know how terrible it is to lose an animal family member. It IS unfair, and the only thing to do is acknowledge the truth of your feelings.

Sending you a big hug.
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