My Dear Little Peanut Parker,
I remember the first time I met you. I was fostering for the dog rescue. I had just adopted your Beagle brother, Leroy from them a few weeks earlier. They told me there would be 2 little boy puppies who had just been neutered. That was you and your brother Porter. Wow, you were both so small. You were in a crate and needing to be watched as you awoke from the sedation and to be taken care of until you were adopted.
You and Porter were brought in the house and it was quiet when you both arrived. We wanted your stay to be very comfortable. I checked on you both periodically to make sure you were okay. We were upstairs and we heard screaming and crying. It was very loud. We couldn’t believe it could be one of you, or both. Such little dogs and such a loud cry. I went downstairs and you were still groggy. It was your brother, Porter who was crying. He must have been so scared, just waking in a strange place. I thought we should bring you upstairs so you could rest a little more. Porter can have a loud and screechy cry. After all, you were both Chihuahua-Beagles.
It suddenly got very quiet downstairs. From screaming and howling to silence.
I went downstairs to check. It was quiet. Porter was not in the crate. It was locked. I couldn’t figure out where he went. I looked under the blankets, he was not there. Then I thought, was he in that crate when I went back upstairs? Yes, he was in the crate, so where was he?
Now it became a mystery. I couldn’t figure out how a dog could get out of a locked crate. I looked around and didn’t see him. Then I walked a little farther. I almost passed him by. Where was Porter? He was rolled up in a ball in my laundry basket, cuddled under the clothes. It was so cute! He was so small, maybe 9 or 10 lbs the most. Here he was cuddled in the laundry basket. But wait! How did he get in there with the crate shut closed? Your Dad said he didn’t put him there. It was a mystery for almost a day. We took him upstairs with you, Parker, who had woken up and you both cuddled together and went to sleep. Leroy was close by. Leroy had new friends! New brothers! Well, not officially, but at least temporarily.
The next day we looked at the crate and to our surprise, there was one small metal bar on the side that was missing. It didn’t seem like Porter could get through that small spot. There were no other bars missing. How do you like that? Porter was so small, like a Houdini, he squeezed through that small opening on the crate.
When we were upstairs with the two of you after you recovered, you were the 2 cutest dogs I’ve ever had. So close with each other and almost pocket size at that time. We kept taking care of you. You both became friends with Leroy. He was lonely before you were here. Parker, you and your brother played and played, you wrestled with each other and it was all in fun and love. Then Parker you soon became close with Leroy. Oh, how you 2 would play together. Leroy is a sweetheart. He was so much bigger than you, but he never let his strength take over, he never wanted to hurt you. He let you win many times.
A month went by and the rescue asked me what I was doing with the 2 of you. They had people asking about you. I asked your Dad. He wasn’t ready for 3 dogs. He thought having company for Leroy was a good idea, but 3 was over his limit. I was concerned if I gave up both of you or one of you, that you may wind up in a bad house where people could misunderstand you, have less patience, and may abuse you. I could not let that happen. I had to keep both of you. I knew I could make this the best home for you and the 3 of you would never be lonely.
I explained to Dad that I didn’t want to split you up. You brothers were very close. You were so young and you were both all you knew. I convinced him that 2 of you was like 1 of Leroy, so It was like having 2 dogs. I said how much I loved you both and how hysterically funny Porter was going in and out of the laundry basket ever since the first night. I couldn’t let either of you go. I loved you both. He finally said it was okay and you both could stay! I was so elated.
My family. Big brother Leroy and his 2 little brothers, Parker and Porter. What a team you made. So much fun for all of you together. It was the start of a beautiful brotherhood and family for us. Adopting you Parker, and your brothers Porter and Leroy was the happiest time of my life. You all made me very happy.
I remember your brother Porter, aka Little Houdini, frequently making the laundry basket a cuddling place. I remember when you and Leroy hit it off and how you both played as if you knew each other since birth. What a perfect friendship!
As the years went by, we faced some hardships. Your brother Porter at 10 lbs, was savagely attacked on our property by a 110 lb dog who jumped the decking from the neighbor’s house across the street. That morning Dad was walking Porter on our property when this happened. This dog came out of nowhere. Your Dad swiftly picked up Porter in his arms, but that dog wanted Porter. He grabbed Dad’s arm and Porter with his mouth and would not let go. I could hear Dad yelling. I came running out and he handed me bloody Porter with 3 large holes on his side and holes on the top of him. He was in shock.
We rushed your brother to our favorite vet, your “pediatric” vet who neutered you. It was his day off, but he happened to be in the office. What a stroke of luck. I don’t know where else we could have gone. He cancelled his outside plans to save Porter’s life, putting tubes in the 3 big holes where he could fit 2 of his fingers in each. For the next month we had to flush him with medicine. I didn’t know if we were going to lose him. Parker, you were so gentle with your brother. You groomed him and kissed him and cuddled with him to make him feel loved and not alone. You were such a loving, beautiful dog who showed so much care when it was needed. It was your love Parker, that helped your brother Porter heal.
A year or so later, Leroy got sick with gastroenteritis. We thought we might lose him. While he was being treated, Parker, you did nothing less than make him feel good and happy. You knew he was not well and stayed by his side. You groomed him and made him feel so loved. You cuddled next to him so he would know you cared. Leroy didn’t need his medicine anymore. It was your love Parker, that made Leroy well again.
Over the years I watched you and you brothers grow a little more and become much closer. For a while you and your brother Porter, would wrestle and play. I had so many videos of you 2 and it was so cute. So lovable. Never any intent by either of you to hurt the other. Always a kiss from you afterward. You and Leroy became great friends. I remember the times you sat on the floor next to the sofa while Leroy looked down and you would jump up, with your little head and bite his ears. Teasing him and getting him to howl. This would go for at least an hour. Then you would jump up on and off the sofa as if you were doing tricks on a skateboard. Leroy would try to catch you and you would quickly jump off, but then back on again, a tug on his ear and his leg, and you were back on the floor. Leroy could have kicked your butt if he wanted. He didn’t. He loved your playfulness. It was your sign of love to him. So many times over the years I watched you 2 play like that. When it was time for dinner, you’d grab his ear and/or leg and the craziness began. Then Porter would come behind Leroy to join in the fun and jump on him. Poor Leroy, he would get teased from both of you, but he loved it. Sometimes I would take my time to feed you guys, just to enjoy watching this craziness. It was all for love. Everything you did was for love. This playfulness between the 3 of you never ended. You were like puppies who never grew up. It wasn’t that long ago when you were all playing like this. You played like this up until the day we lost you.
There were times you and Leroy chased each other around the house and in the basement. You had the advantage of being small, you could slip under the table, under the gym equipment, able to hide from Leroy. After the play was over, there you were again, kissing Leroy, showing your affection as you did every single day of your short life.
Then there were the times you and Leroy fought over a squeaky toy. Leroy, the squeaky hog would always win. I told him many times to let you keep it. He had so many of his own, but he enjoyed the challenge taking it from you. All the times we were all resting in the living room. Your brothers lying down. Mom and Dad watching TV. There you were, with your endless energy, wanting to play. Kicking out your little back feet, jumping forward with your front feet, trying to get someone to play. You wanted to play all the time. You were a very happy dog. Never tired. Always upbeat. Up for anything.
I remember years back when you weighed a little less and you were very spry, you would jump from the floor onto the stove and counter top. One time we found you in the sink! You, a small little dog with amazing energy to jump that high. How many times did we find you on the table, the tall pub style table? How about the time we came home and the 3 of you ran from the kitchen? We knew something was up. I put a box of cereal on the counter. I think this is the first time you jumped up there. The giveaway was the inner plastic bag on the floor. Not one morsel in it or on the floor. You must have been the one who jumped up, knocked it down, and the 3 of you had a feast. That was the only explanation.
How about when we were out one day, and we let you guys run loose around the house? You jumped on my nightstand and then on top of my dresser. Your nails scratched the tops. It seemed important then. Now I cherish those scratches. I’m glad I couldn’t get them out. They will stay with me forever as long as I have this bedroom set. My little boy, I remember you every time I see them. A reminder of my super dog. We didn’t want you to hurt yourself by jumping so high or maybe burn yourself if you landed on the stove again, so we put up locking gates.
What a wonderful brother you were. Always there, always caring for them. Always loving them and giving them comfort. I don’t remember you ever getting sick except the time you got an IM vaccine and you were in pain. You were always a healthy dog. You were unselfish. You gave yourself to your brothers when they needed someone. You proved to be a terrific friend, brother, and son to us. Your affection and love for us, your Mom and Dad, was just as strong as it was for your brothers. You sincerely loved all of us. You REALLY loved all of us. I knew then and I still know now, what a wonderful giving brother and son you were. That’s why I took so many pictures of you when you were kissing us all.
Parker, you never asked for much. You loved finding a small crumb on the floor, it was a highlight of your day. It didn’t take much to make you happy. I’d see you peeking around the wall while I cooked, not only to watch me, but to see if you could catch a tiny crumb or morsel.
Oh, Parker, how smart and sharp you were. On the way back from walking you in the yard, you would tug me and pull me toward the driveway pavement. I didn’t think of that, but you did. The grass would be wet from rain or with snow and ice, and you walked me to the dry area. So smart of you. I didn’t even think of that.
I have always thought of you like this. I always knew what a special dog you were. I wanted to spend more time with you, until you were old and gray. I wanted to be there with you if the day would come when you would need love and comfort from your brothers. When they could give it back to you.
One day, we were walking all 3 of you and a huge Rottweiler, at least 110 lbs. charged at all of us. We were scrambling to get the 3 of you away and make sure the dog would not hurt any of you or chase us. Porter and Leroy were barking. There were only 2 of us trying to keep the 3 of you calm to get away. You got loose from your harness. I panicked, thinking you may get hit by a car. What did you do? You barked and barked as loud as your tiny 13 lb. body could and then you chased away that Rottweiler! You chased it till it ran with its tail between its legs. My little hero. You were our hero that day. Something I never saw you do and something I will never forget.
It was just last summer when the 3 of you somehow got out of the house. One of us left the door ajar. You, only you, stayed on the property. My honest little Parker. You came up to your Dad to let him know you were out and I know you were giving him the message that your brothers were not around. I believe you were trying to talk to us. Because of your warning, we were able to find your 2 brothers down by the corner and get them safely home. If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know if either of your brothers could have gotten hit by a car. You came to us right away. Another time you were our hero. I am going to miss those times.
Every day is empty in this house without you. The pack leader, affectionate and loving brother, the fun-loving, happy little boy. My sweet little peanut.
My angel. You were taken way too soon. On Christmas Eve, one of the worst days to lose you. Holidays will never be the same. Every day I feel I miss you more and more. I can’t explain my little baby, why this happened. I don’t know myself. I do know it should have never happened. Every day is a struggle without you. Now I am facing the hardest time of my life.
Parker, how will we manage without your love? Your love that healed, that soothed, and made us whole again. Your tender love that filled our entire home. Parker, we need you here now for Porter. He needs your love. We need you to watch over your brother Porter who is being treated for pancreatitis. He needs your love and kisses. You always made it right.
Please always remember that I love you and never meant for you to be harmed. I did everything possible to protect you since you were a pup.
I miss you so much. I can’t change what happened. Oh, how I want to, but I can’t. It is very unfair. Your life was taken from you. You were not sick. You were very healthy and very young, only 6 years old. So unfair.
I want to see you again at the Rainbow Bridge, if there is one. I hope there is. I am counting on it. I want to be reunited with you again, My Little Baby, My Peanut Parker.
I LOVE YOU FOREVER,