I just picked up my precious boys ashes today. My heart is so heavy with saddness and grief. I wasn't prepared for his departure. I am in such a lonely and sad place. I don't want to go home. Its so quiet and lonely without my little loverboy here on top of my side. It was a real sunny day and the birds were chirping outside my window. I miss my Shadow running on top of my stomach to get to the window and "bark" at the birdies. I miss my precious little loverboy finding the only spot of sunlight in the whole house and basking in it. I miss him plopping down on my side and sleeping on top of me. I miss his somersaults, his loving ways and him jumping into the "fortress of solitude" on the top shelf of the linen closet. I miss him in his younger days, waiting for me to finish watching the news so that we could both get into bed together and there we'd have our little love sessions where I would tickle his tummy. I miss his beautiful green eyes his intelligent ways and loving mannerisms. I miss my boy, oh how I miss my boy! 

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the day that  the ashes come home is a hard one. But he is home now. I understand your pain and lonliness. that lonliness is so hard to bear. my thoughts and prayers are sent your way. Judy

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Leslie, I'm so sorry.  I know exactly how you are feeling.  I lost my Rudy 5 weeks ago.  I'm still sleeping on my couch because I can't stand walking down the hallway in the morning and not seeing him there at my front door. That was our morning routine.  He was the first one I saw and said good morning to.  We had routines, I miss his goofy ways...I miss every thing about him.  I too hate being home, coming home....it's been really hard for me and my other sheltie Riley.  He and Rudy have never been apart from each other for 10-1/2 years.  He's grieving just as bad as I am.  I just so feel for you.  It hurts so bad...the pain in unbearable at times.  

I would say think of all the good memories, but that doesn't even work for me.  I will smile thinking of those great memories, but then I just start crying so hard because I miss him so.  I'm not even sure how I'm going to get through all of this.  They are our babies, our best friends, our world......

I'm just so sorry. I really feel for you.  I will send prayers your way for both you and your baby. 
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