Tracydhardy
Meryl's short life was not fair :( She was severely abused until the age of 2 when she landed in a shelter starving and pregnant. RESCUE saved her and all 10 babies, it was then that she came into my life. I loved her for four years, through back issues and heart worms. I thought she could survive anything.
10 days ago I walked her into the vets office thinking she had a pulled muscle in her leg. Within minutes of the Dr. examining her I was told he felt a mass in her chest, it would most likely be cancer. It broke my heart in two, years were rolling immediately. I told her, I promised her not to be afraid she was going home with me. Meryl was always afraid of people she didn't know, her trust level was low. How could I leave without her?
After xrays it was determined to be cancer and it was bad. I did leave with only a collar and leash, my baby girl was gone.
I can't stand this pain, it won't go away. I cry and cry everyday.
What can I do to help it go away?
Quote 0 0
Chibi
I am so sorry to hear of your sweet Meryl's passing. You were definitely her savior by bringing her into the shelter of your home and heart.  It doesn't seem fair, does it, that what seemed to be a minor thing turned out to be life-threatening?  You were with her when she needed you most at 2 critical times in her short life.  Meryl isn't in pain anymore although you are left aching.  Give yourself the gift of time to heal your broken heart; it will mend itself but only after a lot of time and tears.  

Perhaps you can frame her leash/collar somehow or hang them from a special hook as a memento?  Hang onto them.  I placed my Chibi's collar and leash along with some other remembrances into a decorative box and placed it in the living room.  He left my world a month ago on December 21.  I, too, cry every day.  Please take care and know that Meryl is in a world with other dogs and is unafraid.  
Jeri
Quote 0 0
Tracydhardy
Thank you so much.
Quote 0 0
Tracydhardy
I did put a picture of her in my mantle just today but I think it was too soon, I still can't look at her. Its so raw.
Quote 0 0
JerseyNonna
I am so sorry for the loss of your dear meryl but please please know that in her heart you were truly heaven sent to help save her.  first you saved her from the shelter and 4 good years after that you gave to her and loved her you saved her from further pain and allowed her to cross the bridge where she is young again, no more cancer and fully healthy.  our fur-babies grab our hearts so fully and so deeply that many times we think of only how much they do for us, how much they mean to us and when it's time (whether it's a long full life of many many years or one cut too short) for them to be called home our lives simply fall apart in total grief.  all of us here know exactly what you are feeling hon and you will have bad days and you will have good days - but meryl is always close by you, watching over you as all our babies are doing.  they remember us with so much love and joy that it pains them to see us crying and i'm certain meryl is right there licking your tears from your face as roxie has said through the medium that she does mine.  perhaps out of your peripheral vision you might see a shadow walk by how meryl used to - perhaps you will feel Meryl's spirit crawl up next to you.  keep your heart open and when meryl feels it is the right time she will bring you another one to love and take care of as much as you did for her.  days do get better hon but we all still cry from time to time - that just comes from such an overwhelming, innocent soul that is loved so much by us mere humans.  take care and many many hugs and prayers to you.
JerseyNonna
Quote 0 0