Jerseyb1
My beloved baby Chubacabra passed on Jan 31st and I still can't believe he is gone.  He was my best friend, he was my constant companion.  He was only 3 years old and so full of energy I can't believe he got so sick so fast and left me when he did.  I'm not sure what to do without him.
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1967Pinecone
I am so sorry.

One thing you can do is spend time on this forum. We're all grieving and you'll find so much love and support here. What happened to Chubacabra? I have had animals get sick so quickly and die days later when they were fine just a few days before. It happens so fast that you can't process it.
"Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow" and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater." But I say unto you, they are inseparable. Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed." Khalil Gibran
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Jerseyb1
I'm not really sure, he was fine one day then the next he acted like he had a cold, by the third day he couldn't use his back legs.  The vet said they couldn't do anything for him but give him flea meds and a heart worm treatment.  Before I knew it he was gone.  Now I'm alone in an empty house and everywhere I turn I expect to see him.
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Jerseyb1
I haven't been able to step foot in my bedroom since I lost him.  All of his toys and his little house is in there.  He always slept with me at night, so I can't even bring myself to sleep.  I feel horrible posting this like I am feeling sorry for myself.  There are so many others struggling with their pain as well, but I feel like I have just shut down.  I can't really talk to my family about this they just expect me to get over it and move on, but that's easier said than done.
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Jerseyb1
It's been just over a week now.  This time last week I was saying goodbye to have you cremated.  The pain is still as fresh today as it was then.  I keep expecting to hear you running down the hallway or peering around a corner waiting to sneak up on me.  I have no idea how to get through each day without you.  Things are not getting easier, if anything they are getting worse.  I wish I could talk to you and feel you jump in my lap one more time.  I pretend each day around everyone that I am doing ok, that I am stronger than I really am, but deep down inside I am just ready to give up.  My heart has been broken.
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nosunshine
Dear Jerseyb1, I just now read your posts about Chubacabra. I know what it's like to feel like your heart has been broken. I lost my little dog, Sunny and it seems like the sun hasn't been out in over 2 months. I am still in a great deal of pain. One week is so short for you. Things will take a while to get better dear. I'm sorry. Grieving is terrible I understand. I listen for Sunny's footsteps too and our house seems too quiet.
You are not feeling sorry for yourself. You are mourning a terrible loss. I wouldn't try and cover up how you are feeling. There may be more animals lovers around you than you even realize. Some people don't understand but it might surprise you how many will. It's okay to feel sad and miss your sweet one. It's a normal reaction and what has brought everyone here to this forum. When you feel like it, can you please tell me more about Chubacabra?
Blessings,
Sharon
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RileysMom
Hi Jerseyb1,

I’m very sorry for your loss. Death is awful as it is, but it can be especially traumatic when they die young and unexpectedly. My heart goes out to you. This is a rough time, and I know how hard it is when others around you don’t seem to understand. But know that everyone here does, we’re mourning with you. Please feel free to express what you’re feeling freely here. There’s always a welcoming ear or someone else who knows exactly what you’re feeling.

I miss many things about my little girl, but of all things right now I’m missing her bark. It used to irritate me at times, but now I miss the sound of it so much. She was always very on top of it and quick to respond. She was really trying her hardest to protect us all. There are many things to miss about our pets. They give us so much joy in many small ways.

I know that feeling of wanting to give up, I’ve been feeling it in moments too. I don’t want to say anything cliched to cover over that feeling, but it will in time get easier. Not because they lose their significance, but because life has this momentum that will carry us on.

Take care and keep posting as much as you need to. We’re here for you.
Val
—Loving Riley, Rosy & Axl always 🐾

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Jerseyb1
Thank you all so much. 

I have had three babies in my life, my husky Jersey, I lost her in 2012.  Then my Chihuahua, Bandit, I lost him in November of last year.  Now my little Chubacabra on Jan 31st.  I know it sounds strange but he had so many characteristics of the other two.  He was constantly with me, helping me through many losses of the past year, that I was so used to having him by my side all the time.  Part of me wants to change everything in the house so I wont be looking for him in his normal places, but part of me can't bare to change anything because it gives me that connection to him.  I have no human children so these were my babies.  After loosing him so young, I believe he will be the last for me, I can't bare this pain again.

I appreciate the support from everyone on here.  A lot of people don't understand why this hurts so much, it has been nice to talk to people that do.

Thank You Again
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catiebee
I so understand everything reminding you of him and looking for him expectantly. The grief is just horrible. 

Like you, my heart feels broken. I lost my girl yesterday. I know the devastation and aching. I keep wanting to run the clock back and have it somehow not have happened. 

I hope for you that it will start to get easier to cope and that you'll feel better and stronger bit by bit.
Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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Jerseyb1
Catiebee

I'm so sorry to hear about your girl.  This is a pain I wouldn't wish on anyone.  I hope that eventually the memories of seeing our babies around the house will bring warmth and pleasant memories instead of the pain of not having them. 

I agree with wanting the run the clock back and have all of this just be a bad dream.  It's difficult to come to terms that I will never see him again.

Hopefully, with time the pain will lessen for each of us and we can remember them with all the love that is in our hearts instead of the pain of their loss.
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Jerseyb1
2.jpg  1.jpg 
How am I supposed to say goodbye to this little guy?
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catiebee
Thank you, Jerseyb1. I've thought that dozens of times in the last few weeks after my dog's diagnosis, how I would not wish the pain on my worst enemy!

I so hate that your baby was very young and that his passing came so soon after your loss last fall. It's terribly unfair! It must be hard, too, that you'll never know what happened to him that he declined so suddenly and so fast. I wouldn't be surprised if you are still in complete shock. It's an extremely hard thing to process, having it happen so fast.

My heart goes out to you very much. You're not alone in suffering. This stuff is heartbreaking.

Hoping somehow today can be a gentler day for you.



Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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Jerseyb1
It's been 14 days and I still miss you as much as the day you left.  I can't stand the empty house anymore.  I can't stand to be around any other dogs.  I miss your little bark and the excited way you would jump on me in the morning when the alarm would go off.  I miss everything.
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Avabear
Hi Jerseyb1, I, like you have no human babies, my dogs have always been surroguate children I guess and I love them every bit as much as any of my friends love thier children I'm sure of that yet somehow that is not always recognised and within a week or so people forget and don't even ask how you are, it's like you should just get over it but it's not that simple they form such a big part of our lives and fill it with love and noise and joy that 'just getting over it' is just not possible.  I hope you are doing ok.
Avabears mummy

'It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them, and every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are.' Anon

 

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catiebee
Oh Jersey, I hear you. I hear you big time. There are so, so many reminders. So many painful individual things they used to do, places they would hang out. And every bit of it hurts to recall and think about. The waves of grief come so fast and hard. It's very hard to bear up against them.

Me, neither. No kids. No other pets. The silence is suffocating. 

My heart hurts for you. Sending warm thoughts, understanding, and hugs. And hoping that soon you'll have relief from at least some of your pain.
Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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