Pooba

It’s been 5 weeks since I’ve lost my Little Girl, “Zoe. She was a 6 year old Sheltie. A shocking accident took her from me as she ran just out of my grip to the underside of my Grandson’s car as he was leaving my driveway. She ran under a closing garage door that only had 12” to go before it was fully closed to get out. I feel I should have prevented it and I know this is making it harder yet. A stage of grief that keeps returning for me. At 62 I’ve had my share of grief over the loss of loved ones with both 2 and 4 legs. Zoe was always considered “Daddy’s little Girl”…and she was. When I came upon the scene she only had less than a minute of life and I swear I saw her tail try to wag in a feeble attempt. I chose to remember it as her saying that “Daddy’s here” and what I meant to her in life and at the end.  I thought I could lie down next to her and leave with her as she took her last breath because I knew what kind of pain was ahead for me.  It feels like what I would imagine losing a child would be like. This was absolutely the worst tragedy in my life so far. After losing a dear Brother in law and friend of over 40 years to a tragic accident 2 years ago , I grieved horribly for so long but the intensity of the emotional pain subsided sooner than that which I am feeling right now. I am still experiencing some kind of involuntary flinches in my body every time I replay her going under the garage door and when I rushed to her side after she was hit. I sob horribly every time I think of her and everywhere I look at home I see her. In so many parts of my life and even in my mind before her death she was a very part of me and my being. I feel I’ve  lost so much when I lost her. Maybe it will just take a longer to heal for such a significant loss…..I pray for the day I can look at her photos and recall with fondness the memories and not this intense pain.  I know there will always be sadness even when healed, but right now being healed seems unlikely. I miss my cuddly little Collie, Zoe.

Paul 
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Sil
Paul,

I am truly sorry for your loss of Zoe.  Such a tragic accident.  I have no words, just prayers.  
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Millie18
I'm so sorry for your tragic loss. I can only imagine those last moments replaying in your mind.

I've lost many friends as well as my father, but the loss of our dogs with whom we lived and spent our daily routines feels far more severe than those deaths. 2 of the 4 pups that passed were my soulmates. The pain was excruciating. They change us in ways that humans can't. They loved us in ways a human never could.

I hope you can find peace soon within your process of healing.
Diana

Mom to Millie, Roman, Snoopy & step sister to O'Boy
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MAlcindor
My heart breaks for you Paul. I am so, so sorry you lost your Zoe in such a horrific way. I lost my Bailey 2 months ago to a dog attack and I know what it feels like to replay that horrible moment in your mind over and over again. It breaks you and knocks you to your knees every single time. I imagine that one day we will be "healed" enough to remember them without the flash back of the tragic moment. They are our companions in our every day life and we miss them in everything we do. 

I pray that you will be able to find some peace and you can start healing soon. Know that I am thinking of you and sending healing hugs your way.
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Pooba
Sil wrote:
Paul,

I am truly sorry for your loss of Zoe.  Such a tragic accident.  I have no words, just prayers.  
Paul 
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Pooba
Thank You Sil

Your prayers are appreciated. 
Paul 
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Pooba
MAlcindor wrote:
My heart breaks for you Paul. I am so, so sorry you lost your Zoe in such a horrific way. I lost my Bailey 2 months ago to a dog attack and I know what it feels like to replay that horrible moment in your mind over and over again. It breaks you and knocks you to your knees every single time. I imagine that one day we will be "healed" enough to remember them without the flash back of the tragic moment. They are our companions in our every day life and we miss them in everything we do. 

I pray that you will be able to find some peace and you can start healing soon. Know that I am thinking of you and sending healing hugs your way.
Paul 
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Pooba
Thank you for the reply Marlen

The shock of a sudden and unexpected tragic death of a precious family member only adds to the pain of the loss. I am also sorry to  you for the loss of Baily


Paul 
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PeppermintPatty
I read your story with great sadness. The love and joy that your little Zoe brought into your life was apparent.

I know there are many who know exactly what you are going through. And the images of her last moments have got to be haunting.

The loss of a fur baby sometimes feel more traumatic than the loss of a human. I have heard many people say. And that's because we form bonds with them that go deeper than we could ever have imagined.

Go easy on yourself during this very difficult time in your life. Zoe was loved. The loss is deep. 

Take care.
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Tankie12
Hi Paul I wanted to stop by and offer my sympathy. I am truly sorry for the loss of your beloved Zoe. I hope you find some comfort coming here and sharing with others who understand the grief you feel. This is an emotional path of so many harsh turns that no one should travel alone, hugs,,,,,
Lynn, Tankie’s mom, forever
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sjw292
Paul, the day will come when you can look at photos with love and laughter. It may take awhile, but it happens. I'm still coming across long-forgotten photos of my never-forgotten pets. My heart catches for a moment, and then I stare at them with fond remembrance. I hope you find peace soon.
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Lrogers424
Be kind, gentle and forgiving to yourself. Dean Koontz wrote in his book about the loss of his beloved dog Trixie : "The pain was so great because the joy before was even greater." We lost our little Daisy to cancer 3 months ago. It was and remains devastating. We are moving forward and adopting again. I pray it will aid in the healing. You are in my thoughts.
Lori, Daisy's Mom and now Luna's Mom
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Lrogers424
Be kind, gentle and forgiving to yourself. Dean Koontz wrote in his book about the loss of his beloved dog Trixie : "The pain was so great because the joy before was even greater." We lost our little Daisy to cancer 3 months ago. It was and remains devastating. We are moving forward and adopting again. I pray it will aid in the healing. You are in my thoughts.
Lori, Daisy's Mom and now Luna's Mom
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