I feel like the loss of my cat of 16 years was also the loss of the last thing that was all my own.

I’ve been living with my fiancé for three years now, always with one of his people. The first year with his brother, and the last two have been with his best friend....and his best friend is hard to live with.


1. Depressed, and I think hates women because of the way he treats them/talked about them when he was still ok with me around
2. Always thinks he’s right (like even to the point of serving a vegan beef stock after we both told him not to...and then casually brought it up to the vegan AFTER which they were not pleased with)
3. Does not clean
4. VERY controlling (and gives me major anxiety over this because around him I constantly feel like I’m being watched like a hawk and am wrong in how I do pretty much anything)
5. Most importantly, he has begun alienating me despite my attempts to talk/include him in things

I feel the need to alienate MYSELF at this point, and it’s hurting my relationship. When I’m in communal spaces, he ignores me. When I’m not, he hangs out with my partner.

I feel like I’ve been very patient, but recently I have wanted to escape. I have SO much anxiety around him to the point of not feeling like I can breathe, and we avoid each other. I’ve been trying and adapting, but I’m not being adapted to, ya know?

And I’m not someone who’s “hard” to live with. I clean up after everyone without complaining. I include him in movie nights and dinners. I try to talk. My housemates I’ve had in the past I have successfully lived with for multiple years.

I always had my cat to comfort me when I felt alone my whole adult life, and he helped me any time I argued with my I just feel like I have nothing that’s mine. It sucks, and I’ve been so anxious and depressed lately. 😞💔 The worst part is that the friend is allergic, so I’m just stuck without the ability to find a new bond of my own.

I’m a total shut-in these days because I feel so horrible and rejected. I just can’t find the strength to venture out and put myself out there right now. 😞💔
Quote 0 0