I feel like I can’t breathe. This past Monday I put to rest one of the loves of my life Caramel. She just turned 10 years old in December and I can still see her wagging her tail as her family sang her Happy Birthday and she ate her special cookie I bought her. Never did I think that just 3 months later she would be gone. Her health just deteriorated so fast. The vet stated she found a "significant mass" in her bladder and recommended I put her down since there were no good treatment options. I stayed with her and laid my head on hers as she took her last breath and whispered in her ear how much I loved her as I rubbed her back and then she was gone.
My baby was so special to me. Since the moment I laid eyes on her February 27th, 2010 (I kept all her adoption papers) at the animal shelter I knew she was the one for me. I had my 8-year old son with me and she looked up at me with those big brown eyes and all the other dogs disappeared. Since the moment I brought her home we had spent almost every night together in the same room most of the time in the same bed as there were many times when I would wake up to her face looking at me from the pillow next to mine. But, now that she’s gone I don’t know what to do. I keep staring at her bed which I haven’t moved and looking at her pictures and videos on my phone. I don’t know how to do this or if I can. I need my baby.
Last time I held her paw