Just be very glad he died peacefully and had a happy life. I screwed up. See below.
Due to budget cuts, I delayed getting health care for my 17 and a half year old cat, not myself. Last Thursday, an unemployment appeals hearing officer told me I was not eligible for extended unemployment. I also read in the news that Social Security would be cut and I am eligible for widow's social security in 5 months. Coming home after visting a friend, I discovered my cat in intense pain but it was too late to take him to the regular vet. Since emergency room vets are very expensive, I decided to wait until morning to take him in. He howled for 3 hours, then fell asleep. When he woke up howling at 2:00 a.m., I decided I needed to have him put to sleep in the middle of the night, no matter what the cost. Now I am haunted by extreme guilt I did not put him immediately to sleep but I know I would not have acted this way if unemployment benefits and social security benefits here in the U.S. were not so chintzy com