Ceecee123
I dont was to go into the details quite yet, but I had to make the hard choice to euthanize my 11 year old Chihuaua. She has CHF PHT and today we learned a tumor. We made the tough call but I have so much guilt and tell myself I killed her. 

I try to remember how hard it was for her to  breathe, how she was struggling, how the vet themselves said she had a few hours, but there was an option to do surgery, remove the mass and then do chemo. That only increased her life expectancy a few weeks. 

I dont know what to feel but I feel like a shell of a person. I truly feel like I will never recover from this. 

And I feel like my poor baby is mad at the decision I made. 

I know that sounds crazy. 
I just am filled with so much guilt and doub . 
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Molly4always
I’m so sorry for your loss.  I felt just like you after I had my kitty euthanized.  You did not kill her; I like to think that I ended my cat’s pain not her life because I believe all our pets live on in a special place.  Now how could she be mad at you for that.  She loved you.  We all feel so much doubt and guilt at first because we loved our babies so much.  I, too, thought I’d never get over losing my Molly but somehow I survived even though I still miss my little girl so much and wish I could hold her just one more time.
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Ceecee123
@Molly4always

Thank you. I know logically I did the compassionate thing buy I'm just aching for her. 
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Kelly_1968
I lost my chiweenie from ketoacidosis and other issues 8 days ago. Yes guilt and regret are huge. Yesterdayi finally accepted that he was reallysick and that i did the right thing but that guilt can eat you alive. You miss that comfort of having your baby there and keeping you happy and relaxed when you came home . I miss mine being so excited to see me and sitting with me and kissing him so much . It will get better just stay strong. Im trying day by day. Its hard to believe how fast time goes and before you know it they are gone.lthink of the good times!! Lots og hugs to you!!
Ceecee123 wrote:
I dont was to go into the details quite yet, but I had to make the hard choice to euthanize my 11 year old Chihuaua. She has CHF PHT and today we learned a tumor. We made the tough call but I have so much guilt and tell myself I killed her. 

I try to remember how hard it was for her to  breathe, how she was struggling, how the vet themselves said she had a few hours, but there was an option to do surgery, remove the mass and then do chemo. That only increased her life expectancy a few weeks. 

I dont know what to feel but I feel like a shell of a person. I truly feel like I will never recover from this. 

And I feel like my poor baby is mad at the decision I made. 

I know that sounds crazy. 
I just am filled with so much guilt and doub . 
Kelly garrett
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Ceecee123
@Kelly_1968

Thank you. 
Today was a better day. I keep expecting to see her at the foot of my bed or hear her jingle down the stairs. I am really struggling with all those little reminders. 

And I keep telling myself how sick she was and that even the doctor said should wouldn't make it within the next few hours.

It's such a huge life shift. 

I am so sorry for your loss. What a difficult decision to make but you did the most kind and compassionate thing a pet owner can do. 
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elb9f
Ceecee, I ache with you.  But you truly made the most loving decision in the end.  Nights seem to be the most difficult times so I'm wishing you strength tonight.  
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Kelly_1968
I dont like change too. Im 52 and that has gotten worse. I look at my other dog, chocolates half brother and he will be 10 in august. Makes me realize he is getting old too. Hang in there your not alone. This thread has helped me realize im not alone. And i have the same thoughts  and emotions as others . ❤❤
Ceecee123 wrote:
@Kelly_1968

Thank you. 
Today was a better day. I keep expecting to see her at the foot of my bed or hear her jingle down the stairs. I am really struggling with all those little reminders. 

And I keep telling myself how sick she was and that even the doctor said should wouldn't make it within the next few hours.

It's such a huge life shift. 

I am so sorry for your loss. What a difficult decision to make but you did the most kind and compassionate thing a pet owner can do. 
Kelly garrett
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