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rachellel

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Reply with quote  #61 
155, I am so sorry to hear about your loss of Henry. I know how much it hurts to lose a fur baby. I lost my precious cats, T. T. and Mustache, on 12/8 and 12/9. I, too, still keep their belongings around the house. I, too, feel lost without them. I go to the places where they would be and imagine petting them. Nothing is the same without them . What I wouldn't give to have them back. To wake up with Mustache on my hip and T. T. by my head. To get up and find Mustache by the dry food bowl waiting for me to add food and then him going to cupboard by the coffee maker while I make coffee. ....
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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #62 
rachellel I seem to be missing Christopher more. Especially because the holidays are over. That kept me busy. I do love Christmas. But the house is so empty without him. I wake up and expect him to be next to me in bed. I still haven't put his things away. Even his cat boxes are still there. I hug his bed every day. He loved it so much. I still talk to him. We are planning on printing some of his favorite pictures and placing them around the house. I do have one in the living room and dining room. I have one on my phone so I see him everytime I use it. It's so sad πŸ˜’.


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155

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Reply with quote  #63 
I still feel the raw pain of losing my kitty cat too. It's a week today that I said goodbye to Henry. Yesterday I had to go to ER because I had horrible stomach pain. They couldn't find anything and the Dr asked me if I felt like I was under stress and I told him about having to put my cat down. He thought that may have been a trigger.
It is so hard to deal with. The sorrow is just relentless.
Many hugs to you.
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rachellel

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Reply with quote  #64 
I lost T.T. and Mustache just over a month ago. I miss them terribly. I'm also experiencing missing them more now that the holidays are over. Keeping busy over the holidays provided a welcome distraction from the grief. I also keep their belongings, including the litter boxes, around. Coming home is always the hardest for me. The first thing I see is their empty food and water bowls. I hug a stuffed cat that looks like Mustache and tell them good night. I remind myself that the depth of grief is due to the depth of the love I had for them. Loving them all those years is worth all the pain of losing them. They will always have a place in my heart. 155, I was sorry to hear about your stomach pain. I hope you are feeling better. Take care and hugs to us all.
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155

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Reply with quote  #65 
Oh thankyou Rachellel. Im feeling better as far as the stomach pain but not feeling generally good today since it was a week ago today I said goodbye to my Henry.
Your two angels knew how very much you loved them and it is very comforting that they are together in heaven. I cant bear to put any of Henry's things away either and walking into the house is so difficult because he was usually waiting by the door for me.
It's just so unfair our pets can't stay a lifetime with us. But I wanted to say how much I loved what you said about the joy of having them all the years you did was worth the pain of the loss. That was lovely and now I can focus on that.
Take care .
Carol
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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #66 
155 The first week was the hardest for us. My husband was really taking it hard. Crying so much for Christopher. But I was in shock. I couldn't cry. Then when he brought my babies bed home, because we took it for him when we had put him down, the reality hit me hard. So I hug that bed every day. Makes me feel closer to him. This morning I just cried when I woke up and he was not next to me in the bed. It was so comforting to have him there. Now my husband goes to work and I am alone. I need to have the radio or TV on because the house is so empty without him. It has been over a month now since my baby went to heaven. The doctor said each day would get worse for him here. But I think he wanted to stay but he couldn't. I miss my mommy time before I go to bed as he would cuddle up with me. First he would want Daddy to brush him and then he would come to see Mommy. A few days before we lost him he feel asleep in my arms. Like he was saying goodbye. He knew then it was time to go but we didn't. They say they know. I found him on his perch which he hadn't done for awhile. He was in his room in his other bed which he hadn't done. He was saying goodbye. He kept hiding from us those last days . The doctor said they do that. I go in to his room and talk to him. We miss him so much. I had him since he was 6 weeks. He was 16 and a half. My precious baby. I loved him so much. So I understand your loss. It is so hard. Rachelle I too appreciate so much all the precious days and years I had with him. I kissed him and hugged him all the time. I sang to him every day. That unconditional love. Only our fur babies give us that.
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155

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Reply with quote  #67 
Canotgrieve,
I'm so very sorry again for the loss of your dear Christopher. My thoughts are with you and your husband.
Your story is especially sad and I know the heartbreak you both have suffered. Sixteen and a half years is a very long time . Sounds like he loved every minute of it and that's all you ever hoped for.
I too found Henry in his final week revisiting places in the house that he hadn't bothered with in a long time. He would go from room to room and find a place or sometimes just sit in a hallway looking down. Very hard to see them this way. He would eat and drink a bit but then even that became non -existant and that's when he would go to odd places and just sit or lay for hours. In the end he hid under a chair facing toward the wall . I knew it was time. I knew today was the day. The house is now empty and like yourself I have to have the TV on all day and sometimes all night too. It's a shame we have to be partially alone in the house during this time. It must be much better when your husband is there. I'm alone most of the time unless my adult children come by, which they do , but the visits are getting more infrequent of course as they proceeded with their own lives. But they loved and adored Henry too so it hasn't exactly been a day at the beach for them either.
I think it was so special that you took your baby's bed to the vet with you. That had me in tears. God bless his little heart.
Right now it's been just a little over a week and the pain is still fresh and crippling. I went shopping with my son a few times which was a welcome distraction even though he told me I was like a zombie lol. I liked the change but my heart ached for Henry so I wasn't very good company ...but he understood of course.
I hope each passing day finds you feeling better..little by little they say.
I hope you can let me know from time to time how you and husband are coming along.

HUGE HUGS!!
Carol

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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #68 
155 Carol I had another good cry before bed the other night. It is so very hard sometimes. Sounds like your precious Henry had some of the same behaviors as Christopher those last days. They say they know. I am so very sorry for your lost. I understand how much Henry meant to you as well.It has only been a short time for you, so be kind to yourself. We need to grieve and that's ok. Fur babies give us an unconditional love like no other. It left a hole in our heart. I am sure you are feeling the same way. There will be no other that can replace him. He was one of a kind. I am here for you whenever you need to talk. Please let me know how you are doing ok. Hugs!
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155

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Reply with quote  #69 
Canotgrieve..Joyce,

Yes I think our babies know when they need us to say goodbye. Although I had a hard time dealing with taking Henry to be euthanised. I knew he was suffering and couldn't bear it much longer but I struggled with HIM thinking that maybe the doctor was going to give him something to make him feel much better and that he'd be coming back home. That still plays heavily on my mind and it just about kills me. It happened like that a few times when he wasn't too awfully bad so the vet gave him an IV(subq fluids)..an antibiotic shot..and prednisolone and when we left the office Henry was raring to go. He flourished from that visit and he was well aware that he had. So inevitably I was thinking maybe he figured the same of this time around. My son said No, Henry knew this time would be different so not to think like that.. but you have little control over your thoughts when your world is falling apart. I know you know what I mean.
I hope you really are doing better at this time. I'm coming along a little better. It's mostly 'moments' now as I call them . I'll be doing the least little thing and it will remind me of when I did the same thing only with Henry sitting thereπŸ˜”
Oh how we loved our fur babies and long for a time we will be reunited.

Big Hugs my dear,
Carol
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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #70 
155 Carol We have regrets from that day we had to put him down as well. The morning before he stopped eating and drinking. All he wanted to do was hide. I would lay down with him where he was an after a little while he would just go to another place to hide again. He was having a hard time breathing. We tried to sit with him and love on him on the couch but he just wanted to get away. That hurt. So before we put him in his carrier we both got a chance to hold him. The doctor said she didn't feel the steroid or chemo would help and just lead to the inevitable but I was upset that we didn't try. I was upset at first that his vet tried to force our hand. But we have to trust she knew what was best. She said each day would be worse for him and we didn't want to see him suffer. He didn't deserve that. He was such a good boy πŸ’™. It's so hard to accept we did the right thing. So I truly understand how you feel.
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155

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Reply with quote  #71 
Canotgrieve Joyce
Yes I know what you mean on vet trying to force your hand. Henry's first vet did the same. It was her office that gave me the dreadful diagnosis. That very day she suggested putting him down right then and there.I asked her if there were meds he could have and she said no it would be too stressful on him.
I ended up going to my son's out of town because I was so distressed so he insisted I come.
Ended up taking Henry to a vet there and he said the cat seemed to be doing pretty good. She herself said her own cat had cancer and was still around six months from diagnosis. (As a little side note this likly sounds terrible but I actually took some comfort in that because I thought well if a vet's cat has cancer then anyone's can.)
Reason being because I had been racking my brain as to how perhaps I hadn't taken care of him well enough. Maybe gave him too many treats..things like that. I think we all go through that in hindsight Joyce. What did we do wrong type of thing?
So needless to say when she said her own cat had cancer her being a vet and all..it gave me a bit of relief. But anyway she proceeded with an IV and Cerenia and a steroid shot and Henry jumped around like he had become a new cat. Dove right into a can of food she set down. So because of that I had almost two full extra months with him only less the last few days he went downhill fast. And yet the first vet was ready to throw in the towel the day of diagnosis.
I hope the pain has eased up for you and family . Are you feeling any better at all?
Let me know.

Carol xo



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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #72 
155 Carol Our vet wanted to put him down that night of the diagnosis too. She said that the steroids would only possibly help for weeks not months. Now hearing your story we will never know. Said he wouldn't be able to handle chemo with his other health problems. She did say since the mass was agressive and affecting his breathing. Thought it was lymphoma which apparently very common for older cats. They week before he was examined by her and an ER doc and neither felt the mass. I think that is what scared her. I think if it was in earlier stages she may have recommended treatment. My husband said we can't look back. We did what we thought was best. I just feel we were rushed into a decision. Thanks for sharing your story. We can help each other through this difficult time.
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155

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Reply with quote  #73 
Hi Joyce,
Oh I wouldn't second guess on your decision with Christopher. You DID do the right thing. By all means.
Henry really didn't have any other health issues. When he was much younger he had a close call with struvite crystals (kidneys) but the vet was able to help him and he was on special diet food since then. No sickness since then though. Also Henry had absolutely no breathing problems regarding the lung carcinoma and when he did see vet #2 he was only very sick and weak from the tests and ultimate biopsy. She said she thought he still had a few good months left.
And even though he perked back up and was good for awhile it was still very hard for me to know that the day would come. I spent as much time with him as I could telling him how loved and cherished he was and pampering him even more than normal. LoL I recall my son saying Henry's likly thinking he never had it so good :)
But it was still very difficult since it was like counting down the days for the 2 months (or sooner).
So yes don't ever think you had made a mistake. Each case is a seperate set of circumstances and you know your own cat.
You have helped me tremendously. It's funny because when I'm having a very bad moment, instead of wanting to call family I think of this forum.

Carol xo

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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #74 
Hi Carol 😊 Christopher had thyroid, kidney, and heart issues. We fought the good fight for all of his issues. He never seemed like there was anything wrong with him. It was just so shocking in one week he went from two doctors, didn't feel a mass. Then all of a sudden it was critical. We didn't have time as we found out one night and the next day had to put him down. He was like a little person inside a furry body. Had such a great personality. Interacted with us all the time. Such a talker. We miss his little conversations he would have with us. He would sing and gave us so much joy. Was a happy little boy. Whenever I was down he would always cheer me up. Always made me laugh. That is why he is so missed. Never will have another Christopher. We think at this point in our life, not to get another pet. We were just so blessed to have Christopher those years. The last 11 years were great for him because of my husband. His first 5 years were a little rough before my husband came into my life. Christopher was his buddy and my baby. Never thought I could love a cat that much. I think it is good to share our suffering and also try to remember the good things too. Eventually I am sure the good memories will replace the sadness.

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Canotgrieve

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Reply with quote  #75 
I miss my precious boy. I can't believe he is gone πŸ˜₯. What a gift he was ❀️. They are not in our life very long. I miss the joy he gave me. There is a hole in my heart. I miss my mommy time. My huggy kissy time. Just holding him and realizing what a gift he was. Even him looking up at me with his precious little face. Mommy loves you Christopher. Life is not the same without you.
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