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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #106 
Quote:
Originally Posted by just_lost


Yeah, that's how Away is.  Hailey usually gets the treats because she's my baby (and because Brutus and Midget don't really care for them, strangely.  Felix liked 'em, though.) but Away comes trotting in and hops on the counter if he hears the treats because he wants some too.  He's looking at the treats and me so eagerly that I can't resist giving him a few before he tries to push his face into the container 😃



It's really hard to not beat ourselves up (probably because we're such easy targets).  I don't see anything to suggest that Milo doesn't mean the world - and more - to you just because the tears are slowing down.  I'm confident that he knows how very much you love him.


Away and Bubby sound SO MUCH ALIKE! Bubby loved sticking his head into bags of treats and cheez-its/chips. I guess he liked the salt. We wouldn't let him have any since 1. he was a cat and 2. on a really restricted diet for the bladder/kidney stones.

Brutus and Midget not liking treats? What cat doesn't love a treat?? Silly critters (btw, you're the second person that uses that term and it makes me laugh everytime).

Thank you for the sweet words about Milo not meaning the world to me. It's so hard because we can make that choice for them. It's not like we can do that for people. Just take them off life support. Not stopping their heart. It really is just the WORST. I just don't know if he could have pulled through one more time and that's what gets me. I know we did what we had to do. Not let him suffer anymore when he was suffering but it's just so hard because he was just a fighter. Hopefully the guilt goes away over time. 

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Bubby's (Milo) Mommy - Always & Forever My Little Man 💜

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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #107 
Hi everyone,

I hope you can help me with something. I wanted to plant something in remembrance of Bubby. We live about an hour outside of Philadelphia and are in Zones 6/7. If anyone has any suggestions it would be very much appreciated. 

The area would either be part sun/part shade or possibly in a container. I was looking at roses and I kept finding remembrance roses...in the UK! Yeah that won't work here. 

I saw this one...Remember Me...which would be very fitting since he was a ginger.
https://www.heirloomroses.com/roses/memorial-and-remembrance/remember-mer.html

Thank you in advance!

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Bubby's (Milo) Mommy - Always & Forever My Little Man 💜

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sopsad

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Reply with quote  #108 

We lost our beautiful girl Sophie, an Old English Sheepdog, ten years old, on 17 Nov 09. Like the lyrics to Mr Bojangles: "His dog up and died, and for 20 years he still grieved". That's me. This is what our vet read to us and Sophie before:

 

Sophie,

 

As we lay our hands upon you,

Before your final rest,

Our hearts surround to love you,

And thank you for your best.

Our home you watched and treasured,

Our lives you truly blessed.

 

Lessening now your burdens,

We tend your tired bones.

Let us be your pillow,

Then wings to take you home.

Listen for God’s calling,

Sweet promises of peace.

Old friend, leap to Heaven,

Suffering released!

 

It will get better………That’s what all these folks on this Forum has promised us, and slowly but slowly, the tears are being replaced by warm memories. We’ve all been where you are and we are all still there with you……..Hang in there…..It will get better.

 

Mike

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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #109 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sopsad

We lost our beautiful girl Sophie, an Old English Sheepdog, ten years old, on 17 Nov 09. Like the lyrics to Mr Bojangles: "His dog up and died, and for 20 years he still grieved". That's me. This is what our vet read to us and Sophie before:

 

Sophie,

 

As we lay our hands upon you,

Before your final rest,

Our hearts surround to love you,

And thank you for your best.

Our home you watched and treasured,

Our lives you truly blessed.

 

Lessening now your burdens,

We tend your tired bones.

Let us be your pillow,

Then wings to take you home.

Listen for God’s calling,

Sweet promises of peace.

Old friend, leap to Heaven,

Suffering released!

 

It will get better………That’s what all these folks on this Forum has promised us, and slowly but slowly, the tears are being replaced by warm memories. We’ve all been where you are and we are all still there with you……..Hang in there…..It will get better.

 

Mike



Thank you, Mike. I’m so sorry your lost your beautiful, Sophie.

The poem you shared that your vet said to you and Sophie was just beautiful and so true. It brought tears to my eyes. How sweet of your vet to do that. Truly touching.

I appreciate your reassurance that it will get better. Milo and his sister are the first pets I’ve had of my own and Milo is the first animal of my own that I’ve had to say goodbye to. It was and is the most heartbreaking/painful experience I’ve had to go through. He was my son even if he had fur. I’ve had pets growing up but I don’t think I really comprehended it all. I was consumed with growing up.

Thank you again for your sweet and caring words.

Hugs,
Jackie

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Bubby's (Milo) Mommy - Always & Forever My Little Man 💜

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lilw4

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Reply with quote  #110 
I agree with just_lost.  There's nothing to feel guilty about.  The tears coming less and less just shows you are becoming more accustomed to Milo being gone.  And while it hurts, and it makes you feel guilty, it's healthy.  I think the feelings of guilt are also normal, as are your thoughts, but everyday getting a little easier is the ultimate goal.  You have to be able to be strong for yourself and your loved ones.  And crying a little less lets you do this.  You don't want to sit in a place of sadness forever.  One day you'll be able to think of Milo and just smile at the happy memory of him and how he was such a great little cat.  
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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #111 
Thanks you, lilw4! I'm in the office today and it's an hour drive to and from. Ugh it's the worst. I just cried coming in. Songs on the radio were just reminders of him. I would sing often to him. He was such my buddy and would just look at me with "those" eyes. 

I hope one day I will be able to have good memories. My husband and I were eating dinner with our daughter and I just looked at him and said this doesn't seem real. Not real at all. I said I feel like he's on vacation and will come back soon. I was up again from 2am to 330-4am. Just couldn't sleep. He would always help me back to sleep. I would lay my head in his belly and he would curl his body around me. It's so hard not having him here. 

I appreciate your words along with the others so much. I'm struggling with not having him big time. I hope this gets easier as time goes on. Just don't know when it will truly click. 



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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #112 
Good morning baby boy,

It's office day today. Mommy had her hour drive and it was a disaster. I cried the whole way in just thinking about you. Daddy and I were eating dinner with Avery last night and I just looked up at him and said it doesn't seem real that you're not here. It seems like you're on vacation and you'll be back soon. Then it snaps and I know you're not going to be here physically anymore. I hate knowing that.

I had another bad night of sleep. I was up at 2am til 330-4am. Man, I miss your Bubby hugs. I woke up this morning and I noticed this mark on my palm. I couldn't figure out where it came from and was trying to replay what I was doing and the last time I saw nothing on my hand. Well, I think it's from holding your favorite little lion and it's the bell. It won't come off but I don't care. It made me giggle a bit and I just thought of your sweet face. 

It's Lola's second Tuesday alone in the house all day. Please watch over her. I know she's bummed but she's doing her best. I couldn't find cat grass for her this weekend so I'm going to search at lunch. Cross your little pink jelly bean toes that I find some. 

I need to start planning her decade party. Wish it was both of your party but I know you gave it all bud. You were tired and so sick but you hid it so well. So well. You're so brave, so strong and always my hero and warrior. ALWAYS! Superman has nothing on you. I heard that on the radio today and thought of you. 

Off to do some work. Mommy has some crazy deadlines and my brain is just not there. I'm just thinking about you. I wish I could just kiss and hug you and never let you go again. I know one day we'll be together again.

I miss you my little man...

XOXO, Love Mommy 💜

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Bubby's (Milo) Mommy - Always & Forever My Little Man 💜

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just_lost

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Reply with quote  #113 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jcunnane


Away and Bubby sound SO MUCH ALIKE! Bubby loved sticking his head into bags of treats and cheez-its/chips. I guess he liked the salt. We wouldn't let him have any since 1. he was a cat and 2. on a really restricted diet for the bladder/kidney stones.


They can be so funny and it's hard to not let your adorable, funny baby have just a little bite... 😉

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jcunnane
Brutus and Midget not liking treats? What cat doesn't love a treat?? Silly critters (btw, you're the second person that uses that term and it makes me laugh everytime).


Not sure what Brutus' damage is; he knows when we're in the kitchen and will hop up on the table and from there to the counter if he even suspects food (which is most of the time because...well, he's just a foodie.  Big lug.)  He'll eat a few treats sometimes, but I think it's only because they're different than his dry food.  Damn cat 😉  Midget is the same way.  Their differences make them funny sometimes.  Midget will lick the gravy off of soft food like it's her first time seeing food and sometimes she'll nibble at the food.  Away would push his face right into the bowl if I didn't tell him to wait - he'll even lick the bowl clean sometimes.  Both also eat dry food.  Hailey will eat both and doesn't seem to have a preference.  Brutus is all like, "Well, if yer gonna twist my bad arm...and if nobody else wants it, I'll eat up the soft food.  Can I eat the bowl too?"  smh

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jcunnane
Thank you for the sweet words about Milo not meaning the world to me. It's so hard because we can make that choice for them. It's not like we can do that for people. Just take them off life support. Not stopping their heart. It really is just the WORST. I just don't know if he could have pulled through one more time and that's what gets me. I know we did what we had to do. Not let him suffer anymore when he was suffering but it's just so hard because he was just a fighter. Hopefully the guilt goes away over time. 


The rhetorical question is "Would Bubby (I love the name 'Milo', btw.  That fits both cats and dogs, but it really fits your Milo based on how you've described him.) have had a good quality of life if he had pulled through once more?"  I know that it's the most terrible and dreadful choice to make: "Keep my baby just a little longer or take the suffering away?"  You had Milo's well-being in mind the entire time, which shows even more how very much you love him.  You did what you thought was best for him even though it devastated you.  That's the most unconditional, no-strings-attached love I've ever read about.
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lilw4

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Reply with quote  #114 
Quote:
Originally Posted by just_lost
The rhetorical question is "Would Bubby (I love the name 'Milo', btw.  That fits both cats and dogs, but it really fits your Milo based on how you've described him.) have had a good quality of life if he had pulled through once more?"  I know that it's the most terrible and dreadful choice to make: "Keep my baby just a little longer or take the suffering away?"  You had Milo's well-being in mind the entire time, which shows even more how very much you love him.  You did what you thought was best for him even though it devastated you.  That's the most unconditional, no-strings-attached love I've ever read about.


Thank for this just_lost.

This is the thing that I keep trying to tell myself in regards to Max, when his time comes, to ease my guilt and help with my feelings of dread and sadness.  I can help him pass in peace, or I can let him die in pain.  Either way I know he's going, even though I wish it with everything to not be true.  But I have the ability to make it less painful for him, and so I will do my best to let him go in peace.  I'm going to be devastated either way, but I hope the guilt will be less by making sure he doesn't go in pain.  It's like a mantra I've been telling myself for over a week now in trying to come to terms with all of this.  I think everyone deserves to cut themselves some slack because it's clear to see everyone on here cares the utmost for their beloved pets and would do anything to help them in any way.
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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #115 
Quote:
Originally Posted by just_lost


They can be so funny and it's hard to not let your adorable, funny baby have just a little bite... 😉



Not sure what Brutus' damage is; he knows when we're in the kitchen and will hop up on the table and from there to the counter if he even suspects food (which is most of the time because...well, he's just a foodie.  Big lug.)  He'll eat a few treats sometimes, but I think it's only because they're different than his dry food.  Damn cat 😉  Midget is the same way.  Their differences make them funny sometimes.  Midget will lick the gravy off of soft food like it's her first time seeing food and sometimes she'll nibble at the food.  Away would push his face right into the bowl if I didn't tell him to wait - he'll even lick the bowl clean sometimes.  Both also eat dry food.  Hailey will eat both and doesn't seem to have a preference.  Brutus is all like, "Well, if yer gonna twist my bad arm...and if nobody else wants it, I'll eat up the soft food.  Can I eat the bowl too?"  smh



The rhetorical question is "Would Bubby (I love the name 'Milo', btw.  That fits both cats and dogs, but it really fits your Milo based on how you've described him.) have had a good quality of life if he had pulled through once more?"  I know that it's the most terrible and dreadful choice to make: "Keep my baby just a little longer or take the suffering away?"  You had Milo's well-being in mind the entire time, which shows even more how very much you love him.  You did what you thought was best for him even though it devastated you.  That's the most unconditional, no-strings-attached love I've ever read about.


I love hearing about your little clan, just_lost. They sound like such a hoot. And I love that you posted photos of all of them because now I can picture each one and put a personality with them. Brutus "eating" the bowl. LOVE IT! That was like Bubby. He was such a HOG! We kept having to move Lola's bowl around so he wouldn't get to it. He always did but it was like game we played. 

Ha Milo was puurrrfect for him. He was just so inquisitive and it was written all over his face. Like "hey what you doing? wanna play with me?? huh huh huh?? what's for dinner?? when is dinner?? GIVE ME FOOOOOOD!" That Barnabe in his belly was quite pushy 😉 I did feel like when I said Milo like he was in trouble. Probably stems back to when my dad would use Jaclyn instead of Jackie. You're like uh oh!

I know it was the best for him. It sucks. No other way of saying it. Just sucks! I know he would have been SOOO ANGRY at us if he needed all the medical care if he pulled through. He would have been completely miserable and loss his proud self. We just couldn't do that to him. We told him we couldn't make him a science project even though we wanted him here. He was an animal and we made him domestic and we tried everything we could have for years to keep him here but in the end these animals have such a short lifespan compared to ours. It's something I keep needing to remind myself of. I thought of him so much as a "human kitty" that I needed to step back and remember he IS an animal. He'll always have my unconditional, devoted love for life 💜

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Jcunnane

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Reply with quote  #116 
Dear little man,

Another day, another sleepless night. I think this one was the worst. I've been up since 2. Never was able to fall back asleep. I miss your cuddles so much. I miss your smell and your belly fur.

Loli did ok yesterday. She just misses you so much. She was out and about after I came home. I think she was very lonely and just needed attention. I hate Tuesdays. She hasn't gone downstairs. I don't think she has fond memories because of your last few days down there. I hope we can get her to think otherwise over time.

Today is the last day of the work week because of the holiday. How you hated fireworks. I hope you're enjoying them up there bud. You don't have to be scared anymore.

I hope you know how much I love and miss you. Not sure when it will get "easier". Tomorrow will be 3 weeks. It feels like years since I last held you and kissed you. Just wait til we reunite and I'll never let you go again and you'll give me that look like "oh mom enough already!" and i'll just keep kissing you and hugging you. 

I've included a recent pic of Loli. I wanted you to know she's ok. I know you know since you're watching over us. 

I love you my little man...

XOXO, Love Mommy 💜

Attached Images
jpeg A13DACEE-B39E-4CC5-B7A8-3813745C5AFB.jpg (128.73 KB, 3 views)


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Ceceliadempsey3

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Reply with quote  #117 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jcunnane
Dear little man,

Another day, another sleepless night. I think this one was the worst. I've been up since 2. Never was able to fall back asleep. I miss your cuddles so much. I miss your smell and your belly fur.

Loli did ok yesterday. She just misses you so much. She was out and about after I came home. I think she was very lonely and just needed attention. I hate Tuesdays. She hasn't gone downstairs. I don't think she has fond memories because of your last few days down there. I hope we can get her to think otherwise over time.

Today is the last day of the work week because of the holiday. How you hated fireworks. I hope you're enjoying them up there bud. You don't have to be scared anymore.

I hope you know how much I love and miss you. Not sure when it will get "easier". Tomorrow will be 3 weeks. It feels like years since I last held you and kissed you. Just wait til we reunite and I'll never let you go again and you'll give me that look like "oh mom enough already!" and i'll just keep kissing you and hugging you. 

I've included a recent pic of Loli. I wanted you to know she's ok. I know you know since you're watching over us. 

I love you my little man...

XOXO, Love Mommy 💜
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Ceceliadempsey3

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Reply with quote  #118 
I read your daily messages and feel your pain each day. Was just visiting a friend who has a cat and she told me her big huge cat Mittens always sleeps with her which in turn made me think of you. Oh I’m so sorry. I’m sure lack of sleep is not helping . My dog was very big and a bit difficult to cuddle. But I managed. I miss him so much and don’t think I will ever get use to not having him with me. Some days are now easier then others. But I still get that sick feeling when I walk into my home and he is not running and knocking everything down to greet me!😢😩. It’s so difficult and I’m tired of being sad. I really do try to keep myself busy outside the house. I am truly depressed but in time I guess it will get easier. Hope you will soon get a full nights sleep. Hang in there
Sending you peace and hugs.
Cecelia
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Memories_of_Marmalade

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Reply with quote  #119 


I noticed recently that moving a few pieces of furniture around has helped my mindset with that feeling of "emptiness." Which I plan to do more of this 4th of July Holiday weekend. Some things I will keep the same, but there are just way too many reminders still. And all I sense is emptiness when I return home. I am also going to use draped fabrics and blankets etc. to cover areas until I am a bit more healed up. I will still have a memorial display and photos etc., but I can't handle my entire residence reminding me of my grief and sorrow at the present time. 

James
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Ceceliadempsey3

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Reply with quote  #120 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Memories_of_Marmalade


I noticed recently that moving a few pieces of furniture around has helped my mindset with that feeling of "emptiness." Which I plan to do more of this 4th of July Holiday weekend. Somethings I will keep the same, but there are just way too many reminders still. And all I sense is emptiness when I return home. I am also going to use draped fabrics and blankets etc. to cover areas until I am a bit more healed up. I will still have a memorial display and photos etc., but I can't handle my entire residence reminding me of my grief and sorrow. 

James
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