JaspersMom
Two years ago, yet you have never left my heart. You are as close to me now in spirit as when you were physically here. I remember how you used to love to sit on the windowsill when it snowed, you seemed almost mesmerized by the snowflakes as they gently fell, then after awhile, you would close those beautiful green eyes of yours, and fall sound asleep. I used to wonder what you were dreaming about, you always looked so sweet and peaceful. I could never have imagined back then that you would not be here with me today. I know now that you were only on loan to me for such a short time, perhaps the angels needed you up there, you have such a sweet and gentle soul, perhaps you were here to teach me about a very special love that knows no bounds ... no bounds. All I know is, no matter how long you were here with me, it could never be long enough.

I would have traded places with you in a heartbeat, I would have taken on your illness and pain, I would have gone with you if only I could have, we would have crossed that bridge together ... but I suppose in a way we did, because I know that as my hold on you became lighter, and my voice became softer, and your dear little heartbeat slowed, and that radiant light ahead of you became brighter, you knew I was still right there with you, holding you in my arms, and as my tears fell and your eyes closed, I knew that you had found your rainbow ... and then my world turned very dark and cold. I did not think I would ever feel the warmth again, I did not think that I would ever see the light again, but you sent me so many signs, even through the deepest throes of my grief, I could not overlook those signs, there are no coincidences, those little signs meant the world to me, and helped to bring all those broken pieces of my heart back together again.

The warm sunbeam always shining down upon the place you used to lay, the delicate blossom wafting down upon my face, that single perfect pawprint in the snow, such wonderful and healing little heart tugs that could only have been sent from you. They say that time is the great healer, but I miss you more today than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow. Hold onto all the sweet memories my sweet boy, hold onto all the love, and know that every day that passes by brings me one day closer to you. I am so happy we found each other, even if only for a little while. My life is forever changed because of you, and I refuse to ever let the sadness and pain of our separation overshadow the beautiful joy, light, and love you brought into my world. Thank you for finding me, thank you for loving me ... I am so happy you chose me.

Pamela Lynne Crawford
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KimR
Thank you for sharing. I lost my Gwen, my heart, my once- in- a-lifetime cat last night. She had kidney disease and heart disease and heart failure threatened. I couldn't let her suffer.

I miss her like my next breath. There are no words. As you said, I would gladly have gone with her. I have a husband and adult children who need me here longer. I am looking forward to the day Gwen and I are together in eternity.

At the vet's office I was in anguish, I pushed it down enough to get home. Now the tears clog my throat and I push them down too. If I let them go now I may never recover.

Gwen's love, our relationship, could not have been planned, just like yours with Jasper. It is a miracle, a gift from God. I have 2 other cats and 2 dogs. I love them. They love me. They are not Gwen, God bless them.

Again, thanks For your generous sharing. Two years is no time with a love for all eternity. I am happy for you, that Jasper is helping you get through your days. I cling to the hope my Gwen will do the same.

God bless you, Jasper's Mom.
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JaspersMom
Kim, thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words in response to my tribute to my Jasper. I am  so sorry that you had to say such a sad goodbye to your beautiful Gwen, and my heart goes out to you in your loss ... please believe me when I tell you that I understand. I understand how it feels as though your heart is breaking into tiny little pieces, so many times I was in wonderment that I was still walking around and that I was still on this earth, because my heart and soul hurt so badly, and the tears just would not stop, and the absolute sadness of it all almost consumed me.

 But I stayed the course, so to speak, and I stayed open to the signs from my boy, and I let his sweetness and his love surround me, and that is what got me through. Even though we may not be able to reach out and touch them, or hold them in our arms, does not mean they are not still here, in every way that counts. Just know that your dear kitty is watching over you from above, and she can feel the love you have for her even now. Take care and know that you are in my thoughts and prayers for peace and comfort, and know that your sweet girl is still so very close to you, and always will be ... love never ends, it only waits. Hugs to you and your Gwen, from me and my Jasper.
Pamela Lynne Crawford
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