I am so so sorry for your loss. You are not alone we all have beat ourselves up for what we did
or didn't do and all the what ifs
If you hadn't left him at the vet he might have passed at home and you would wonder why didn't I leave him in the care of the vet? The vet might have saved him..
I wish I had the ability to help ease your pain but unfortunately it is the price we pay for the great love we had the good fortune to be blessed with
I lost my beloved cat 13 weeks ago and am still completely devasted and have moments where I can't comprehend he's not coming back
I too want to be 100% certain my guy is okay , I think we have to trust that they are in a better place
What's keeping me going is the hope that I will be reunited in some form with him again, some day
I'm sure your Ziggy knew you loved him deeply and is watching out for you and your family now.
Sending you wishes of peace and comfort
Bee- "Good night sweet prince & flights of angels see thee to thy rest"