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kittens_with_mittens

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Reply with quote  #1 
My precious Baby is barely clinging to life. She is fourteen years old and an indoor/outdoor cat - she has always been incredibly adventurous and loves being out in nature. She is a survivor through and through and I'm amazed she made it this long seeing as we live by the woods. I adopted her when I was sixteen years old, and had I known better I would have likely kept her as an indoor pet, but alas, her wildness and sass made her who she is.

She began to rapidly decline a couple of months ago, seemingly out of nowhere. She lost weight but was still active. I found that she had worms and successfully treated them, but after a couple of weeks she still didn't gain any of her healthy kitty chub back. My family has recently hit hard times due to different medical emergencies that popped up one after another and can't afford the several hundred dollars the vet quoted us.

Skipping ahead, we did eventually manage to book an appointment where we will only have to pay the visit fee and euthanasia, sans all blood/medical testing. We cannot afford it but her life, even at its end, is more important to me than financial security.

Baby's appointment is for tomorrow morning at 9am. I don't know if she's even going to make the night at this point however. She's skin and bones, will not eat or drink. I have her in bed with me, on a blanket with my heating pad underneath it. The heat is on s very low setting but she seems to shift away from it a few minutes after I put her on top of it. I thought it was important to keep sick cats warm, but could she really be too hot? I've been giving her small amounts of water through a dropper and a tiny bit of milk. Should I continue this? She's always loved milk by the way and tolerates it fine. She doesn't have the strength to sit up or really change positions anymore, responds only slightly to chin and head rubs, and is mostly just laying painfully still with occasional leg movements. My heart is broken and I am crushed by what's happening, but right now her ladt moments are my concern. What can I do to make my Baby more comfortable?

Thank you.
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PeppermintPatty

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Reply with quote  #2 
My heart aches that you are going through this. Baby sounds like a tough little cookie, so I know it is excruciatingly painful to see her in this state.

I've been where you are twice since August. I watched my kitties fade away and wondered if they would even make it through the night. They both waited until the weekend, the last one being over the long New Year weekend. I cannot advise you medically. I can only tell you that I knew the time had come and they only way to make them comfortable was to let them be. Watching for the last time when they were unable to stand was the saddest thing. I too was giving them water by syringe as I know they were getting dehydrated. One got so weak that even that got to be too much. I bought some puppy pee pee pads (out of necessity), so I lined a cat bed, put it on the couch and just let them lay by me. One made it through the night until her morning euthanasia appointment. The other passed in her sleep.

I think you are doing all you can to make her feel comfortable in her final hours. It will be a long night for you. She's probably at the point where she just wants to check out because not being able to move, eat, use the litter box, etc., has got to be miserable. I would just stay near her and assure her that she made your life a little slice of heaven while she was here.

Baby was lucky to have you. I am sure she will be dearly missed. I will light a candle for her.

Take care.

Patty
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kittens_with_mittens

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Reply with quote  #3 
Thank you so much for your heartfelt response and for Baby's candle. I'm so sorry that you've endured this too... I feel for anyone who's had to watch someone they love die, especially when you are helpless to take their pain away.

I have mixed feelings when I say this, but Baby passed away about an hour ago. I spent the entire day with her in bed, petting her and cuddling her and talking to her. I could tell something was extra wrong when she began gnashing her teeth and "digging" at the air, laying on her side, struggling to move. Shortly after that her breaths became occasional gasps with longer and longer intervals between them... it was one of the most heartbreaking things I've ever seen. I laid beside her and stroked her and told her how much I loved her the entire time, tried my best to soothe her. It didn't last long and didn't appear horribly painful, but I have no idea how much she hurt... if she simply couldn't express it anymore. I hope to god that her passing was easy and that she knew I was right there with her, loving her through her last moments. I miss her so much already, though she's still behind me wrapped up in a warm blanket. I had a feeling it would happen tonight but nothing can prepare you for the moment it happens. I'm grateful she's no longer suffering and I hope she's somewhere happy... as much as I selfishly want her back, in a way I'm glad she didn't continue to suffer for 9+ more hours.

I will still take her to her appointment at the vet and ask them to cremate her for me. My friend recently did the same and they returned her cat to her in a beautiful cedar box. Burying her is not an option here, ground is frozen solid and covered in snow, but I like the idea of having her ashes with me. I'll have a part of her forever.

I love her so much, I hope she knows it. I'm going to light a candle now too, thank you for the idea and for your kind words.
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PeppermintPatty

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Reply with quote  #4 
R.I.P. dear little Baby. :(

I am so sorry for your loss. I'm glad you didn't have to go through the euthanasia process. You were there providing comfort to her at home, and she passed in her own time without the necessity of the added trauma of a car trip, the vet's office and injections.

My kitty passed at about 2:00 a.m. on 1/2/18. I remember not sleeping much and how surreal it all was to have this little lifeless being beside me until the sun rose and it was time to take her in. I so know what you are going through.

I know my little girls would be happy to welcome Baby with open paws as she crosses over the Rainbow Bridge where they can scamper free and find their way around together.

I wish you peace in your time of mourning.
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kittens_with_mittens

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Reply with quote  #5 
Thank you again, your words mean a lot to me. That's exactly how it felt... surreal. Years ago I would have been too afraid to touch a "dead thing", yet it was so difficult to grasp that this furry little body that I had loved for 14 years no longer had a life inside of it, and I can't count how many times I petted her and held her like a baby and spoke to her following the first few hours of her passing. She never became a dead thing to me, just my beloved kitty. I almost felt like I was disrespecting her when I finally wrapped her up and brought her to the car. But realistically I know that she was gone and her body is no longer important to her.

Make sure you tell your girls to greet her. She's a little feisty and anti-social at first but I hope her reservations just melt away over there and she's free to zoom around with her new friends without pain.

Thank you.

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PeppermintPatty

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Reply with quote  #6 
Awww ... your little Baby was so beautiful. What a shiny coat she had. I'll be she was a little rascal. I can tell by your words that she was deeply loved and adored.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss. Today is a day of mourning for you. Life will not seem as usual so take the necessary time, and do the necessary things, to get through it. Some days with be okay, others you will feel like you are going off the deep end. At least that is the way it is for me.

You and Baby are in my thoughts and prayers on this day.

R.I.P. Baby love.
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bluegreen_eyes

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Reply with quote  #7 
Your Baby is adorable, sorry for your loss.
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Sandy_T

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Reply with quote  #8 
Baby was so beautiful. I can tell how much you loved her. She is running free and happy now.
I hope you find peace and know you did all you could for her.
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