Hello everyone. This is my first post and I'm relieved to find a forum such as this to help us with our grief. I have been in the middle of grief since my cat Molly passed away last month. I went through the beginning stages of grief such as denial, regret, guilt, and anger. It was very hard but with each day, I've come closer to accepting she is gone.

However, I fear that my other cat Dinah is grieving more than I expected. She is a 13 year old calico and I know they can be chatty but lately she has been crying for no reason. Whenever she did this before, it was usually to be fed but now she does it even though she has food. She also has been a bit withdrawn and only wants to lay in the bathroom or another bedroom. Everywhere else, she's not interested. I've made attempts to play with her, pet her, get her to follow me, and she'll meow hello but that's about it and rather just continue to lay down. I also noticed that whenever my husband is in the shower, she walks around and cries. She has always taken a liking to him so I figure she just wants his attention. It just is hard for me to see all of this and not be able to help.

I should also mention that she has also "looked" for Molly by opening drawers. We did bury Molly and so she has been able to smell that area and we also had her sniff and acknowledge Molly before she was buried so I'm not sure if that was enough for her to accept her passing. Dinah is also eating fine and doesn't appear to be physically sick.

Any ideas or relatable stories are appreciated! Thanks everyone
-Erica Missing Her Molly
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I went through this years ago when I lost my beloved Squirt.  So I had three littermate; Gee, Squirt and Sydney.  Sadly Gee died first at just 9 years old from Large Cell GI Lymphoma.  Squibert spent a couple of weeks crying/howling in the middle of the night, looking in every nook and cranny etc.  He then developed a mystery illness where the vet couldn't find anything obviously wrong with him, but put him on a course of antibiotics and he slowly got better and returned to normal.  Sydney did not seem affected by the loss at all.  Two years later Squibert developed Colon Cancer and after surgery and Chemo died without ever even finishing his course of chemo.  Sydney spent several weeks distraught yowling at 2 am and 3 am following me everywhere but not content to sleep with me at night, instead wandering the house yowling.  Finally he was put on a small dose of prozac (I had to get it from the compounding pharmacy).  at the same time I adopted (first took them in as a foster) another group of three stray littermates.  While he never bonded with the the same as he did his brothers he seemed happy to have the distraction from his loneliness and loss.  The medication worked wonders too I think.  He was on the medication for about 3 months and then we tapered him off and he did fine.  He went on to live to be 18years old and slept with me every night and became my soulmate kitty
I think some grieving and neediness and looking for their soulmate is totally normal, but I think you should talk to your vet about how long to allow for it and what to do if it does not resolve soon.  Having a plan will make you feel better too.  
Also, you can try a stuffed animal, some say it helps them.  
Best of luck.
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Hi MissMolly,

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your Molly. I'm in the beginning stages of grieving for my Bubby (real name Milo) who we had to help cross to the Rainbow Bridge exactly one week ago. Almost to the minute :( 

This has been the most heart wrenching experience I've gone through. I've lost humans before but this is just on another level. He was my rock.

I have been wondering how to help a grieving cat as well. We have Bubby's littermate/sister, Lola. Bubby was just shy of 10 years and they have been bonded since the womb. I think in the 10 years, they've been apart for a week while he had multiple stays at the 24/7 animal hospital.

Lola has been eating like Dinah, but she seems sad. She keeps laying on the shirt I last held Bubby in and just seems down. We play with her but she's not up to her full speed. You can just tell. The first few days after his passing, she kept looking for him and kept looking out the window and skylights in the kitchen. It was so sad. She also kept sniffing his water dish. 

She took care of Bubby all the time. Whenever he threw up, she was there. She was there til the end being with him and taking care of him. I was able to have them give each other kisses the day I took him to the vet but he never came home :(

Any advice would be appreciated. I've been so heartbroken, I called Pet Caregiver Support Hotline today. She said she was going to send me some information on helping the grieving animals along with myself. Once I get it, I'll make sure to post it.

Bubby's (Milo) Mommy - Always & Forever My Little Man 💜

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