curcumas
I lost my baby Mango one month ago today. I promised my son we could get another cat in time. We have an 8 year old cat that never got along with Mango. She is skittish and jealous, but loving to me. It breaks my heart that she seems happier now that Mango is gone. She was upset for a few weeks after Mango even though they didn’t get along well. She slept all the time and cried at night. Now she is mellow. So my son found this kitten on the local shelters website. I agreed to put a hold on her and look at her tomorrow. Here is the thing, I don’t want her, I don’t think?. I look at pictures of Mango and I just cry feeling like I am betraying her. It’s summer and we have time to spend with a new cat to get her adjusted before school and work start up, but I’m not ready. Bella is happy and mellow. I’m so confused. I know a kitten in my hands will warm my heart, but how can I get one when Mango isn’t here and I still have a broken heart. What if Bella hates her. What if she isn’t loving. I thought I was doing better but when I looked at a picture of Mango it killed me. Will it ever not hurt, will I ever be ready? It’s for my son, not really me. I don’t know what to do. If it wasn’t for Bella, I would go for it, but I am really worried she will hate her. I don’t know what to think or do. I know Mango isn’t coming back and I need to move beyond this somehow, but I am still holding on to her. What would you do?
Quote 0 0
mistybmanes
I so wish I had words of wisdom for you right now. I struggle with this same thought of am I betraying Annabelle if I decide to get another dog.  I have had many tell me to get another to give me a companion and company since it was only me and her.  I think maybe you should go check the kitten out and listen to your heart.  If you think its right then take it and if it doesn't feel like the right time or things then don't.  I think if you do maybe Bella will get used to the kitten in time  I don't know.  I wish I could be more help  
Quote 0 0
Sil
curcumas,

I understand your predicament.  I lost Sol a very special male doggie - he was eleven years old.  And for a long time, I would not allow myself to even forget "those awful last hours before Sol said good bye"...…… I felt as if, I forget, I would be betraying him......and, I am just talking about "painful memories", so bringing another fur baby, was out of the question.  

Sol knows that I will never replace him.  Sol is secured in my heart.  But, as time passed, my heart started to "adapt".  The house felt so empty, so hubby and I decided to adopt a fur baby.

Every one of those fur babies are "unique", one does not take the place of another.  Listen to your heart, and remember, there are no easy answers, sometime, when you least expect it, "life" will surprise you. 

Hugs
Quote 1 0
curcumas
Sil, I know what you mean. The last moments... that is all that I see most of the time. I remember the good times, and they were so good, but then I see those last moments, last days, the awful decision I had to make and it tears my heart out. It is raw and sad but makes me remember her so well right down to how she felt in my arms and in my heart. My son is 8. He didn’t have the same attachment I had with Mango after our almost 19 years together. I don’t want to deny my son love from a fur baby. He is already In love with this girl. He even has her picture from the shelter on his iPad wallpaper and we haven’t even met her. Mistybmanes, the feeling of betrayal is so hard. I honestly don’t know if I could get past it in time. I think if it were up to me I would wait. However, I don’t want my sadness to keep everyone else in the home sad. I will look at her. She looks scared in her picture. I know whoever we get, Bella will hate. She was abused before we got her. Mango and her battled for alpha, so maybe a kitten would be less threatening. I want a happy home with animals. In the past it was just me and my girls, but now it’s not just me so, I have to consider everyones needs. I thought I was doing well, but just looking at the possibility of bring another cat in makes all the painful feelings about Mango resurface. I miss her so much. So so much..
Quote 0 0