Stasia
Hi,

New here. I just registered today b/c it has occurred to me that I may be still grieving the loss of Sylvester even though its been over a year since his passing. Sylvester was 4 months old when I brought him home and he lived to be 20. I had to put him down on February 27, 2017 due to his old age. It was just time. It destroyed me. 

Right before he died, I had re-arranged the rooms in my apartment and in order to move the furniture around, I had to put everything in boxes. Well, those boxes have never been emptied. Nothing has been organized. Just the opposite. For over a year now, I have changed from a neat, organized, clean person to someone who can't even do the dishes or bathe regularly. I know I am depressed (I do have a therapist and take meds) but even though I know what is going on and what I need to do, I just cannot seem to do it. At all. I have had a friend come in twice to help me clean and then I promptly mess things up again. It's awful. I have never been like this and I can't stand it but I can't fix it for some reason. 

My friend said it was grief the other day. I didn't think I could be still grieving so badly but when I tried to figure out when my lack of caring began, it does go back to after Sylvester passed. And of course having depression, this made it worse and I guess I have just never "snapped out of it."

Anyway, that is why I am here. I look forward to sharing with you all and helping each other.

DSC_0002180_zpsb1c1ef81.jpg 


Stasia
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Bailey15
Hi Stasia,
I just read your post. Sylvester was a wonderful part of your life for a long time so it's no wonder you miss him so much. This was a huge loss for you. It may be that you are just coming to terms with what that really means for you. In any case I think it's good that you have posted here. There are so many people whose lives have been changed by the loss of their beloved 4 legged friends. I don't think any of us is ever really the same person as we were when our friends were such a big part of our lives.
I am so sorry you are finding it so difficult to cope. Perhaps sharing stories about Sylvester can help you to let out some of the grief that you may have buried. I think you should also bring this up with your therapist so they know how much his loss has impacted you.
Sylvester is such a beautiful kitty! Please share more about him when you feel up to it.
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending hugs,
MJ 🤗
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Olgita256
Hey there Stasia... I totally can relate. I put my dog Down October 21 2017 almost 6 months ago he was almost 16.. This Friday he would turn 16. I have changed so much. Like you I used to be so clean, organized, physically active... working out riding my bike. I do none of that now I try to do better but I hurt so much. Time has helped but today I heard a song that I used to sing to him and I was at work and had to run to my car and hide to cry like a baby. I saw a therapist a while back she was a good listener . I hope we both get to feeling better. I have another dog who I’ve had for 4 years I got him so Buddy could have a companion. I love him but not like I loved Buddy. His name is Hugo he gets a lot of love and attention but I miss my Buddy.
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Kittypiller
Hi Stasia, what a beautiful kitty. I can understand your pain, I had to have my 4 1/2 year old kitty named Butters put to sleep dec 21 2017 and am still a total mess. Our fur babies are such an important part of our lives and its so hard to loose them. You came to the right place there are a lot of people here that completely understand and are very caring. I feel like Im never going to get over loosing Butters and still cry about every day.
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Lamont
Wow, what a handsome guy. And, yes "Sylvester" was a perfect name.

You had a lot of good years, how lucky you both were to have them.  Hopefully he's getting to know some of the other kitties who've left for Cat Heaven, and has made many friends.

It's never an easy road after such a special friend is no longer with us.



L
Bertie's Daddy
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Stasia
Thank you everyone. I know I'll get there eventually. 
Stasia
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Stasia
@Olgita256 I know exactly what you mean. I have to run into the bathroom at work to cry. Not too often these days but when it still fresh, all of the time.
Stasia
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Boomboom
Sending prayers your way ASAP
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exburt
Yeah, I agree. After reading your first post, you are the poster child for depression. 

I've been looking at the picture of Sylvester you posted.  Great shot! I find myself thinking, if you could talk to him, what would he say to you? He sure looks like he always had a lot to say. 

After over a year, maybe it's time for you to have that conversation. 

I wish you all the best.  
B Weinstein
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