78674463_Lucy

It's been 2 1/2 months since I had to put my sweet little Sunshine to sleep. I miss her so much and have been grieving deeply. So much so, my health was being affected. Finding this website has given me much solace.

During the passing weeks I have spent a lot of time with, “Coulda, Shoulda, and Woulda”, as have many of you. It just breaks my heart further. My only reprieve was the day the vet told me she had cancer I knew I had to send her off to heaven the next day. She was only 11 and we were soulmates. From the minute our eyes met we knew we were made for each other!

Recently, my doctor loaned me a book, “How to Survive the Loss of a Love.” It has made a huge impact in my recovery. I’m not much of a reader, but each page is very short. The most it took me to read a page was maybe a minute and a half, some only 5 seconds. Since reading this book I have been able to rationalize some of what I have been going through and what I need to do next. If you need some extra comfort I encourage you to read this book.

God blessed us so we can be a blessing to others.

 Lucy, Sunshine and my new kitty, Missy                                                                                                           

 

Lucy D. Blascovich
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Jody
Thank you for the book. I'll definitely be looking that up! I am so sorry for your loss and grief. I know all to well what it's like. I too felt my golden and I were soulmates. That's why this has been so difficult. We too looked into each other's eyes and knew it. He died on 7/25 suddenly. I too have so many shoulda's....
Today I went and got a massage. That helped me release so much tension and stress. Along with this beautiful forum. Thank you for the encouragement during this diffucult time in your life...
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78674463_Lucy
 Words are inadequate to express the sadness I share with you.  This forum has been a blessing for me. It's a relief to know there are others out there in search for comfort.

I have a massage scheduled this week. I'm sure it will help. 
I keep the book with me, so I can have an instant word of peace. One of the pages eases some of my shoulda's... by reminding me that I am only human.

You are in my prayers for blessings and peaceful days ahead for you.


Lucy D. Blascovich
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Sydsmoms
Sending you strength! I will have to look at that book. Thanks for sharing.
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westdenali
I want to hear more about Sunshine!  can you tell me more about her? I had a cat Sunshine. Got him when I was 11. He was in a box under the Christmas tree. I loved that cat. He was the one who opened the cupboards and pulled the mini bags of Cheetos out. He proceeded to open every bag and just eat a couple Cheetos. He lived for 17 years. I still think about him although it was 30 years ago.
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78674463_Lucy
How sweet of you to ask about Sunshine. I got her at a cat hospice referred to me by my pet sitter. Someone dropped her and her brother off; they were 6 months old. Since the hospice only accepted sick cats they needed someone to take them. I can still see her sitting tall in the cage looking out as if she was expecting me. As soon as we held each other, we knew we were meant to be. I wanted her brother also, turned out he was ill, so they would not let me take him.

Every day we got up together with the same enthusiasm we had the day before for each other. I was in my late 40's, so I would go to work. When I got home we couldn't wait to see each other. Love was all we were about. She was so special. Those are the days I think about.

After Sunshine died I wrote down memories that I never want to forget in a notebook that is only 4" x 4". Each page has one memory. The thoughts are short but very sweet. I haven't visited it, but someday...

I'm sorry to hear about your wonderful mischievous Sunshine. :)  I too, got a cat when I was 11, her name was Mitsey. I Shared her with 6 bothers and sisters. But we were the best of friends and after my siblings got older and moved out, her and I were stuck like glue. She lived to be 18. That was 33 years ago and I, as you, still think about her. It took about 25 years to not cry when I talked about her.

Sunshine is my fourth kitty I had to put to sleep and they are all very special to me. I imagine them all playing together in heaven. But Sunshine was my soulmate, my heart throb.

My new kitty, Missy (6 1/2 years old), is such a joy and once she breaks me in, we'll be the best of friends!

Thank you for asking me to share.
Lucy D. Blascovich
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westdenali
My Sunshine was an orange tabby. We called him Grandpa. As he got older he looked like an old man. Even acted like one. I wanted to call him butterscotch, but my mom and brother thought it was not a good choice. I guess we came up with Sunshine. I have had many cats and dogs my whole life. But there are just a few who really stand out. I loved them all. My white cat Snowbell passed 6months ago. He reminded me so much of Sunshine. He was 15. He survived a 5 day trip to New Mexico last year along with my cat Marrie and dog Basho. He loved the desert. And now my dog passed last week. Its like I haven't gotten over my cat yet and now my dog.  So now I have a new white kitten. She is such a joy. I was to adopt her before my dog got sick but we postponed it till he got better. That didn't happen so I just got her. She helps with the distraction, but as you know could never replace the ones we loved. We move on. Thanks for sharing.
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78674463_Lucy
I am so sorry to hear about both of your furry friends. The were certainly gifts from above. My prayers for you are for peace in the following days ahead.  

I'm glad to hear you have a new little one and that she makes life a little easier for you. You are blessed.


Lucy D. Blascovich
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Monkey
So sorry for your loss.  It is always sad when we lose a pet, but when they are our soulmate, it is sooooooo difficult to move on.  I too lost my soulmate kitty 13 months ago, and it is still hard; I still cry and feel sad, although it is getting better.  I can't seem to find another kitty as I keep comparing them to my soulmate cat.  I am working on that.  This forum is great; I wished I had started this months ago.  Everyone involved in this forum has a deep love for their pets and understands what each one of us had had to grieve through.  I think we can all feel guilty forever; I know I still do, but we are only human and imperfect.  Even though there was no way my cat who had kidney failure would recover and I thought she was ready and made the decision to euthanize her, during her visit to the veterinarian after getting the tranquilizer injection, she seemed to come to life and not want to die.  It took almost 45 minutes for her to pass, and it was excruciatingly painful to me.  I just keep reminding myself what a brave kitty she was, how she said good-bye to me with her paw on my hand and intentionally snuggled close to me on the table as she passed.  She like all of your furbabies are no longer in any discomfort, and I know they still love us for taking care of them and our shared love.  I read a really good book called "Animals and the Afterlife" which really helped me.  It is not just a book about dealing with loss but supposedly true stories told by pet owners of afterlife events they experienced with pets who had passed and the possibility of reincarnation.  Regardless of your beliefs, I found it to be pretty educational and I look at nature a little differently now.  The biggest thing I got from this book is that our pets who have passed do send us messages all the time and check up on us in various ways, but that it is up to us to recognize and interpret the signs they send.  
Monkey's Mom
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78674463_Lucy
Hi Cheryl,
I am so sorry for your loss of your soulmate. We totally understand each other. Your story has touched my heart trying to image your pain. I held Sunshine, also, but she passed right away.  I have tears for the both of us and our fur angels. 

What touched-me-so is what you said about feeling guilty forever and that we are only human and imperfect. I try to remind myself of that and pray deeply to accept it, but it is hard. I miss my little girlfriend sooo much. It's almost 3 months and I am getting better. The crying adds a lot of stress for me. I do good for a while then take a step back, then move forward again. I guess it just takes time. 

You are so right about having this forum, it has made a major difference in  my healing. I looked at the book online. It sounds like a must read for me. Thank  you for that info. 

With every pet comes a broken heart.

Lucy
Lucy D. Blascovich
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