I am so sorry for your loss. Never ever let your lack of finances determine your guilt. Love is more powerful than money. Celebrities with all the money in the world still lose their pets.
I once heard a beautiful story about the love between homeless people and their pets:
https://www.cbc.ca/radio/thesundayedition/the-sunday-edition-for-february-2-2020-1.5444682/this-is-the-lifeline-this-is-the-friend-why-pets-matter-to-homeless-people-1.5444688 I know the feeling when you say it is traumatic and life changing and I don't think any of us are prepared how to handle afterwards. Sending you love.
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