Bertie in the sky, with diamonds. She looks wonderful!
I've always sung to my cats. Just lost my wonderful Ernie, the pain is tremendous, but I have had wonderful support from friends & family (all of whom have had many critters over time and understand completely), this forum, some books, local organizations and hotlines. I still sing to Ernie. He brought the great joy to everyone who met him. I'm glad Bertie's home with you. I agree with Peppermint Patty. Hyperthyroidism is not necessarily caused by chemicals, and is a not uncommon disease with kitties. I've had cats with it, so have family members and friends. Some cats respond well, others not so much, which is very hard. I lost my kitty George of 18 years in 2006 with it. When we bring animals into our lives, we can forget their lives are shorter than ours, that there are hazards everywhere in life, and at some point we will suffer greatly when they are sick or gone. But we take them our into homes and hearts anyway, because they give us so much when they are here. Some of our critters live longer and some not so much, but the pain always comes. It's the price we pay. There wouldn't be pain if there wasn't so much love. We can choose whether or not to bring new animal pals into lives after a loss. Some of us choose to do so right away, some wait a long time, some never do. Everyone is different and makes the choice when the time is right. When I lost my George in 2006, his brother Nick a few days later (they were pals, both old), I was heartbroken. My husband and I went to the animal shelter a few days later because I couldn't stand the empty house, and I found my amazing Ernie, who gave us such joy and helped heal me from loss of George and Nick. We also picked up a young cat from our vet who needed a home. I have places for them all in my photo album and on my bookshelves and my heart. They're all different. A few years later we picked up a third cat just because. Then a few years ago my neighbors found an old broken stray and we took him in, he lasted 3 years before we needed to let him go. He was a sweet, cranky old bastard with a lot of medical issues. Lotta pain there too, but just to see him happily relaxing in our garden shade on a warm summers day was worth it. I know you are in such great pain that life feels unbearable right now. Please do whatever you need to do, cry, be angry, whatever. Pour yourself into your grief, feel it all, it is healing and a testament to your relationship with Bertie. Trust yourself. You know what to do. And as PP noted, we all second-guess ourselves as to what causes things -- but most of the time, we really don't know. Don't let fear prevent you from receiving and giving more critter love, if that's what you choose to do when you're ready. I know it hurts, but it's so worth it Above all please be kind to yourself. Bertie in the sky, with diamonds. All my heart to all of you on this thread and forum.
Ernie in the Sky, With Diamonds