huskiesmom
It has been a little over two weeks now since we said goodbye to Lucky, our loyal and happy dog for the last 11 years. We are left with our two younger huskies now, Luna who is 5 and Nanook who is 2. We rescued Nanook in March of 2016 and is has been one of the most rewarding things I've ever done. We have seen him blossom into an incredibly affectionate and cuddly, very friendly and happy dog. He has excelled at obedience training and we're working on getting his Rally Novice title. Our lives revolve around them and I thought all the training and activities we are doing with them would help me take my mind off of Lucky. But I have still felt his absence every day and felt like I was falling into a depressive episode.

I often like to look at Petfinder since that is how I found Nanook, and I dream of helping more huskies that need rescuing. A few days ago, I came across the picture of this beautiful husky and started getting that feeling like I wanted to bring her home. I have really wrestled with this, because on the one hand, thinking about helping her and welcoming a new dog has really given me something to look forward to. But I also worry that I might be making a decision that could impact all the activities we're doing with our other dogs, and I also don't want to just be making an excuse not to think about losing Lucky. I don't want it to seem like I am replacing him. I don't want to act before everyone has processed their grief.

How soon is too soon? I know it really depends on everyone's situation, but how did you decide when to bring another dog home, especially if you already had others?
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camunki
hi, you mentioned that you came across a beautiful Husky and got that feeling as if you wanted to bring her home...........that is a good feeling and you should go with your gut. 

You may get different responses here on time and how long to wait, but each person is totally different on their reasons to wait longer or get another pet sooner or never get another pet. You have to go by what YOU feel is right.

I myself, I adopted my rescue girl from TX and I live in the New England states, I also found her on Pet finder. I did this after I lost 2 of my beautiful pets Daizy and Munki both in 2015 (they transistioned 11 months apart).......After losing my Munki on Dec 3rd 2015 I waited about 11 weeks before taking Rosalyn home...............but I actually started looking about 2 months after I lost Munki....I know it is never ever to replace our beloved pets, but it brings a whole new meaning to our lives knowing that we saved these precious pets from a life they never knew could exist, filled with love, walks, warm beds, great food and a new pet mate for alot of the pets. I always had 3 pets in my household and after losing 2 in 2015 I felt it was time to bring another pet home and I never regret that I did.

I think you should check into the beautiful girl you saw on Petfinder and you are doing it for all the right reasons to give back love and never to replace your Lucky.

Cam


 
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Jairbear
I have to really moderate my feelings about getting another dog. Both of my dogs were "impulse buys" at the time I got them. With Jair, I was feeling terrible at work and I had always wanted a dog of my own, so I drove two hours after work one day to adopt him 4 days before Christmas. With Sadie, I had just bought my first house and moved in and everyone told me I shouldn't jump into getting a new dog since I already had Jair, but I wanted a big dog, so I got her less than a month after we moved. Now, I have moods where I desperately want a new dog to fill the hole, but later in the same day I have moods where I think I never want another dog again because it hurts too much. I'm sure I will get a new dog eventually, but I don't want to leap in without thinking like I did with the last two.

I think it also has to do with your remaining dogs. If they're ready to play with a new friend, it could be great. Sadie has been way more needy than she used to be because she's never been alone ever since we got her. My kitten, Walter, is also being really needy because he used to wrestle with Jair all the time. Now he tries to with Sadie, but she's huge and can be too rough with him and scares him. He needs a smaller dog who he can bond with. They all have their own grieving and needs too.
Kristen
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cakes488
You can never replace a pet that has passed.  Every time a pet has died and I've gotten another one I never feel I'm replacing them because that is impossible.  I say you get another pet when and if you want to.  I have added new members of the family quite quickly after a loss...I've also waited for longer periods as well...it depends and you should do what makes you happy and you're so right...there are so many that need a good home.  But I know what it means when I start looking on petfinder!!!  I think you'll be having another member of the family in your midst soon.  Even if you don't do it right this minute..you've started thinking about it and as one pet person to another...that's always the first sign that an adoption is imminent!!! 

And yes it does make me feel better to help another pet (and they help me)  and I feel another pet helps bring 'life' back into the house. 
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HGregory
I'm going to be completely honest and confess that I was looking at cats on Petfinder several days before my Bittersweet passed away. I feel terrible and disloyal about it, but having a completely empty house for the first time in 15 years is even worse. Coming home and not having anyone to check on, any heads to count or bowls to fill, is...not something I can do. She died on Friday and I brought home a foster cat today from a group I regularly foster for. I know she's not going to stay forever, but it's nice to have something alive in the house that isn't a plant. 

Anyway, what I mean is, no matter how short a period it's been, if you're ready that's what really matters. What other people think about your decision is up to them. 
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huskiesmom
Thanks so much for all your replies. And yes, I won't be able to go fill out an adoption application on her right away, because we're about to go to a big dog show with Luna and Nanook next week for a few days, and then have another short weekend trip planned with them. So in any case we will have to delay for a few weeks and it will give me some more time to think.

We have a memorial service for Lucky planned on November 18.. I am not sure whether I would feel disloyal somehow getting another dog before we have even done that. But there is a part of me that feels that having a new dog there would help the transition somehow.. saying goodbye to Lucky while at the same time welcoming a new family member.. perhaps it wouldn't be so sad..

But like I said, I have time to think. And I will consider what all of you have said, so thank you.
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Kronsky
My 16 year old Obie cat passed on September 9, leaving our home catless for the first time since 1985. Less than 3 weeks later my son brought home 2 tiny kitten litter mates in need of a home. Honestly it was too soon for me. They are very cute to watch but I haven't really bonded with them. They also had a few unfortunate incidents outside their litter box that did not endear them to me.

I wish I had allowed myself to wait longer so I could appreciate them without unfavorably comparing them to Obie.
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LizK5
The decision was taken out of my hands and I was given a 4month old puppy (Gia) 12 days after my 11yr old dog (Baby) passed away in June. Baby was the absolute love of my life and it's made it tough for me to bond with Gia. I know I will love her very much..it's just going to take some time.
Honestly, I don't think it would have made much difference if I had been able to wait longer before getting another furbaby. I think the feelings of disloyalty and guilt are something most go through whenever they get a new pet after a loss.
Anyway, my opinion is...if there's a pooch out there that you click with now, go for it! It's never a mistake to share your love and life with a dog that needs you❤️
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Susie_Squillions
Time is just a number. Your heart knows when the time is right to open to new love. Whether it's three days, three weeks, or three years, you know when it's right. Nothing will ever replace the one you have lost, but the new ones bring with them their own lesson plans for us. I have learned so much from every animal I've ever loved, and I wouldn't trade any of them for more time to mourn a loss. Our animals live in the moment, appreciating the goodness around them. Let's live like they do! Life is too short to live like a human when we can live like our fur-pals!
In one of the stars, I shall be living. In one of them, I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night. -- The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery

All tears are healing tears.  They help to wash away our sorrow and allow the first buds of happiness to blossom in our hearts. -- Susie "Squillions"

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Butterfly_Kiss
The only thing to go off of is how it feels. If the thought of getting another pet evokes some comfort and hope, do it. If the thought brings up negative emotions like guilt and fear, you're not ready. If you want to be ready sooner, consider modifying your perspective. Having loved multiple animals throughout my life, I would like to share a little wisdom...
Think of not only what a new pet can do for you, but what you can do for it. There are so many fur-munchkins out there who would benefit from your loving home. I agree with Susie. Life is short, precious, and there are many animals to love. This does not in anyway suggest that you move on to the next without a second thought. You will always cherish that special and unique relationship that can never be duplicated. But please realize that NOT getting another pet will not bring back your deceased one or help your deceased pet in any way. In fact, I feel their souls take great pleasure in seeing us love another, and they are in a sense experiencing the new pet with us. I believe that life is about turning pain into beauty whenever possible.

I also understand that we each deal with grief uniquely. But I speak for myself and many others in saying that getting another pet absolutely helps. My strong suggestion to anyone who plans on doing this is do what I did and create a journal beforehand, listing all sentimental memories, nicknames, phrases, etc. relating to the one you lost. It is incredibly comforting to know that these memories are accessible to me any time I need comfort, want to reminisce, or want confirmation of a memory. Since our memories fade, especially when we bring another pet into the mix, the journal has been so helpful in preserving my memories of him. Not to mention, what better way to truly honor them than this?
KG

~Our Love is eternal & 'death' cannot sever the bond we created. The spirit never dies. The Love, bond, & spirit are ours to cherish always. That is a gift that will never be taken away~
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