I've been having these flashbacks for a while now late end of June or July and that's when the tragedy happened .

I'm was 11 now 12 and I was outside and my mom had found a slip & slide I ran out the door my little brother was behind in front and I was behind I didn't shut the door I wasn't thinking and my little chiuhaua my little beautiful dream ran out and stopped my the deck I picked her up and put her in the garage not checking both of the doors she ran out to the road the busy cars streaming by .

My mom ran out after princess onto the busy road not thinking just doing and I stood and there I froze I was in another world I was transported to another home our old home (we had just moved to the new house ) .

I had finally snapped out of my shocked state when it was too late she was gone in a second I seen the car come whisking by and ... You know the rest god shielding my mom and toke my dog .

Which I am blessed to that

I have these flash backs they occur every day mostly it's hard because I stand close to the road for my bus and I really hate it .

They've occurred in dreams while I'm writing this while I've been listening to music any time really it's the moment the car hit her .

I don't really talk to mom about this mostly because I'm scared and really shy and I don't wanna cry I want to be strong but this tears me to shreds and rips me up into tiny pieces .

Princesses birthday is on Christmas Eve the day before Christmas so that's really nice Christmas will defiantly not be the same I hope the accident flash backs stop by then because that and the guilt of not shutting and checking the doors are enough for me

I need support of some type of someone who has had this type of event happen to themselves .

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You are going through so much pain grieving over your darling Princess and remembering
how she died.  Please don't bottle it up you need to talk about it with someone caring
who will listen to you and let you sob your heart out.   You don't need to be strong,
you need to let your sorrow out. It doesn't matter where you cry,  out in the bush, somewhere away from people,  cry and cry and cry .  We all do here.  Our tears would fill an ocean.

I do hope there is someone caring in your life who you can
talk to and cry to about this, and perhaps your mom would like to talk about it too, or a
relative?  . Or perhaps a teacher/counsellor at school?  Don't worry, the flashbacks will go in time
and the more you let your grief out the sooner they will go, I promise you.

Please come back here and tell us about your lovely Princess.  My little chihuahua died 5 weeks ago
and I miss him terribly.  What happened with Princess was an accident, nobody's fault, and she knew
you loved her dearly.
Hugs and love   to you

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