savini

Hi everyone its my first time on here but i was hoping for some advice on how to deal with my situation. my cat graham was just under 15, she had lost weight and i put it down to worming, and then i noticed she wasnt eating a lot and looked the same way as my other cat did when he died. anyway the day before new years eve she ate nothing she was very weak and actually fell down while tryin to jump up on things, i stayed up with her all night and took her to the vets next day they said leave her to have an x-ray and they would phone. they phoned and said there was a problem with her kidneys, they could put her on a drip but there would only be a slight chance of her pulling through which is fine if it was for the best. whats bothering me is they said do u want to come and see her before we do it? and because i remembered how bad my other cat was i said no just do it as soon as you can.now i cant stop thinking why didnt i go up? she might have been waiting for me and the last people she saw were strangers. i cant stop thinking it.  advice anyone?

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misscandy77

Guilt is the worst part of the grief.  I've certainly gone through my spells of guilt. Sometimes animals purposely want to go when their owners are not there, the seem to know how painful it will be.  Have you ever heard how they hide when they are ill?  My baby died at the vet after I left as well, it's hard.  I know I usually tried to give them the last gift of comfort, but you can't always choose.  Remember your kitty as she was when she was healthy and fast.  You don't have to see the first vision being the one of her death, choose to replace it.  I still think about every scenario and every minute of the day that I lost my Chloe, but two weeks later, I can accept it a little better though the guilt sometimes turns to anger since mine was taken so young.  There is no right way to grieve.  All you can do is what you know at the time.  Don't beat yourself up for it.

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