Chrissie
24 hours since our beloved 21 year old had to take her final journey to the vets. For the first and only time she made the trip in my arms the whole way instead of in the cat carrier protesting loudly all the way. For the first and only time she lay quietly on the couch looking at me with those beautiful eyes instead of trying to get back in my arms and if possible inside my jumper! She let them shave her arm and inject her and I held her head until her eyes finally closed. For all those reasons I know she was tired and ready to go and I did the right thing but my feeling of complete and utter grief has completely blindsided me. I miss her so much and feel so guilty.
Quote 0 0
sebastiansmum
Oh Chrissie I do feel for your loss.  It is so hard parting, even if the cat had a long and lovely life.  

I lost my beautiful baby boy Sebastian to what looks like mothball poisoning.  I too feel so guilty and so lost.  I used to have a few mothballs in my wardrobe but they were always in a special container that means the cats couldn't eat them.  But I went away for a week recently and never realised that my house sitter had put the mothball containers out in my yard in an old dish (presumably because she didn't like them).  Then the rain must have come and they dissolved in the rain water.  Sebastian loved to drink from puddles etc. so I can only think that this is what happened because 2 days after I got back he suddenly started having a seizure and then his lungs filled up with fluid.  I rushed him to the vet and the first thing he asked me was about mothballs and I said he didn't have access to them - not knowing about the ones in the yard at that point.  So my poor angel died at the vets because the vet couldn't get the fluid off his lungs.  I am heartbroken and feel like it's all my fault.  I keep thinking that if I'd answered the vet differently he would still be alive.  He was only a year and a half old and he was my gentle angel.  How I'll ever recover I just don't know.

I so feel for your grief - it is a pain so hard to endure - but I'm sure your cat had a wonderful life full of love with you and you did everything possible for her.  You don't need to feel guilty - as you said, she was ready and 21 is a great age.

They say time heals - and I hope for us, and all who have lost a beloved pet, that this is true.

Rosie


Quote 0 0
Chrissie
Rosie, thank you so much for your post. I'm so sorry you lost Sebastian when he was so young, and so traumatically but you mustn't blame yourself for things that were beyond your control and that you had no knowledge of. As you said, time heals, or at least it takes the edges off the raw grief that we are feeling right now. I'm immersing myself in this wonderful site today and taking comfort from everyone's wise words. Take care xxx
Quote 0 0
MonaGirl
Hugs. I lost my little girl six weeks ago on this Monday. She past at home from heart failure. I had her for nine years.
Quote 0 0