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LynnCDM
Dearest Gemma... as you know our stories are similar. I too was very depressed,and did not want to leave the house. Sometimes when I did leave I experienced terrible anxiety. No matter what I did I couldn’t make this, and all of the painful feelings, thoughts and memories go way. I felt so much fear that I would be in the awful cycle of pain forever. It has been 4 months for me and the pain has diminished significantly. I still regret what happened, I still wish I could do it over, I still miss Sugar with all of my heart. I still feel blame and regret. But I want you to know you WILL get better Gemma. Sometimes it’s 10 steps forward and 5 steps back. Grief is a process. Grief coupled with regret and guilt is a more difficult process... but you’ll get through it. I remember my therapist telling me I wouldn’t feel the debilitating pain forever... I didn’t believe her. I thought that surely my case was different. But she was right.

I also sent you a private messsge Gemma. Please know I feel your pain. I am here for you.

Love to you Geema 💜. You’re going to get through this !
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LynnCDM
Hi Gemma... just checking on you. How are you going today ? I’m thinking of you and sending you love and hugs.
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Tankie12
Hey Gemma just stopping by to say hi, I left you a pm earlier today maybe you haven’t checked in today? You and your sweet babies are in my prayers,,,,,
Lynn, Tankie’s mom, forever
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Humanswithpaws
It’s took me a long time to face coming back on here and as I type this I’m in tears. As my story tells here I lost my baby boy Noah nearly 12 months ago at the very young age of 5 years old. And boy am I still struggling. I have severe insomnia which I have had since Noah left me I don’t feel like I’m the same person anymore I haven’t even bothered dating. I still cry often over Noah and I’m still absolutely heartbroken. I just don’t know what to do anymore and no body seems to understand my pain a year on xxx
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Tankie12
Gemma, you’re not alone sweetie. Read the posts from those you may remember we all still struggle in our similar or different ways. We’ve changed and still have to navigate our way through this new and unwanted part of life. One thing a lot of us have in common is we believe our babies are spirits and we Will see them and be with them again. Look for signs from your beloved Noah and never stop talking to him, he hears you.
Think of it like this; the people who’ve had it with hearing about your pain would NEVER feel like that if you’d lost a human baby/child. They don’t get that this is no different but for us it’s not. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you except you lost your best friend, your soulmate w/paws, your companion, YOUR baby. That’s huge, epic and the pain is unforgiving. If they don’t get it they never will. It’s also the reason this is your place to surround yourself with those that do. And you can go away for as long as you chose and still find those who share a lost heart. We don’t have the answers but we understand the questions.
You’ve been a wonderful and loving Mommy to Noah and Gemma you did everything for him. I’m sorry your heart is still in such a tangled mess but I truly understand, huge hugs across the miles of water Gemma,,,,,
Lynn, Tankie’s mom, forever
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deedee76
Gemma my dog passed on Friday from gastroenteritis and like you I blame myself for so many different things what if I had brought him to vet earlier what if I hadn't gone to work that day, what if, what if, what if. I know how you feel gastroenteritis it's a very nasty and fast working infection my heart is broken just like yours.

Dee

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LynnCDM
Dearest Gemma.... I have thought about you a lot...and sorry you are still hurting so deeply. I still have some very sad, rough moments myself. I love what Tankie says above... it makes me feel like I am not alone. I hope you can find some comfort in knowing you’re not alone either.

Hugs to you Gemma. 💜
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