I lost my dog, Luna, on September 5th. She was almost 16 years old and sick, she couldn't jump anymore because her legs were too weak and she would need pills for the pain. Even when she was in pain, she would still want her pats and cheek rubs, she loved them and she loved to be next to you all the time.

So I left my country 10 months ago and moved to the U.S. to be with my now husband. Back then, he was going through a lot so he needed me there. What I knew though is that once I left, I would never see my dog again. I had to prepare to say bye to her, I had to prepare for her death in advance, and it killed me inside. I cried so much, so so much. In the end, I got a plane ticket this January after my husband threatened me to break up if I didn't get one (he lost all control of his emotions). On January 9th, I was about to leave for the airport. She was laying on my bed, next to my pillow. I patted her and I was about to break down but I told her I loved her, that I would miss her a lot. She watched me leave from my bed, she looked so sad... And that was my last memory of her.

On September 5th, early in the morning, I received 10 messages from my sister. She told me that my dog stayed in the vet for a few days and that, in the end, she had renal failure and they decided to put her to sleep. They told me when my dog was already gone, so suddenly. My sister said that she didn't know how to tell me, so she just didn't so I wouldn't worry about my dog. It still broke my heart and I cried my heart out that day.

I asked her where will she be buried, but she told me she would be burned. I almost threw up, I didn't know how horrible it was to think that someone you love will be burned to ashes. I breathed in and thought, well, maybe I'll have her ashes to cry to. But no, my sister said that it was too expensive to keep her ashes and that they would be kept with other animal's ashes or who knows where. I lost it there. I was angry and incredibly sad, I would have nothing to cry to, only her toys. My sister said her ashes or body would have no value, because it's just a skeleton, not really her, that she would live in our memories and hearts. I know she is right but it still hurts to think that I couldn't say bye to her and that I will never be able to.

The fact that I am far away from home makes it worse too. I feel like if I go back home "I'll go back in time" and she'll be there, but I have to keep telling myself that even if I go back, she won't be there, no matter how hard I try, no matter what I do, she won't be there. It just feels like a nightmare I'll wake up from soon.

I do have a puppy (she is my husband's dog) and she does remind me of Luna. She is a yorkie and my old puppy was a mix of a yorkshire and something else we don't know, but she had a yorkie face. Her name is Little bear and I am really grateful that she is there for me, she is a sweetheart, super silly and caring (she loves to give you kisses on the nose) and I love her a lot.
But I will never forget my puppy, Luna. She was the sweetest puppy I've ever met, she had no malice in her soul, super patient, super loving and caring. Clever too, she knew many tricks I taught her. 

I'll always miss her... This was her last photo, when my sis took her to the vet a few days before she was put to sleep. As you can see she was old but she still had so much love in her eyes, she still wanted to be with us but she couldn't...

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I’m sorry for your loss of Luna. She does look happy in the picture but that does not mean that she felt good. Animals will try and please us until they take their last breath. Knowing you had to move you did say your goodbyes to Luna.
Mayb your family thought it best to handle things the way they did. They had to make a choice and they did. It may not have been easy for them to do what they did. It’s sounds like a very emotional situation for everyone.

As far as “ being burned” it’s called cremation. A lot of people and pets are cremated. Some people believe the ashes don’t signify anything. I was glad I made the choice for cremation and ashes. But I was on the fence for a few days. Ashes or no ashes Luna will remain in your heart forever
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When I was 17, my mom told me my old dog had a heart attack on 4th of July, that fireworks must have caused it. I'm 37 now, and am fairly sure she had her put to sleep because she was old and had been suffering from terrible skin problems the whole 7 years we had her, as well as arthritis. I had just recently gone and moved her from my dads house, and she was not comfortable or doing well. The last 2 years we hadn't seen her were not kind to her. We tried many expensive treatments to help her over the years, but none did. So I know my mom was doing a good thing by preventing Princess from suffering any more, and saving me from having to make a choice I doubt I could have made. As for cremation, that is the choice I have made for my deceased pets as an adult. I find it more comforting than the idea of being buried. I plan to have myself cremated, too. Having The ashes makes some people feel better. I know they are just ashes, and not my babies, though. The memories we have of them are what is important. I believe your family was doing what was right for Luna, and that is what matters here, that she was safe and comfortable and loved.
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