Puppyluv
Om Saturday 4/21 I had my 4 year old baby boy, Brady, euthanized. He started vomiting Wednesday morning, stopped eatting thursday and hadnt had a bowel movement since Wednesday.
Friday, the vet took xrays which showed something in his stomach. In order to find out what it was, he needed ultrasound or surgery. On top of it, 3 years ago he was diagnosed with mastio muscle miositis, a genetic auto immune disease. He has been on prednisone ever since.

Did to the MMM & prednisone surgery was extremely risky. Additionally, I have been on disability for 3 years with a limited income so surgery was something that I had to seriously consider the pros and cons.

When I initially took him to the vet Saturday morning my intention was to have they hydrate him, take him home and care for him, praying the blockage (if that's what it was and not a mass) would pass. Unfortunately, he kept vomiting, the Dr asked me to rethink my decision. Brady was in pain. I have the Dr the ok and Brady was gone.

My heart is broken. My home is empty. My mind is a mess. I'm sad. I'm angry. I should have had surgery. I should have given him more time. I should not have let him down. He loved me unconditionally. He was smart, brilliant actually.

This pain... it is awful. Unbearable.
Like nothing I've ever felt before.
I miss him so much.

I'm alone in my pain. In my life.
No one understands.
They think I've completely lost it, maybe I have.
It's been 4 days. 4 days of crying. 4 days of pain. 4 days of regret. 4 days of headache.

Unconditional love he gave me and I let him down 💔😓
Quote 0 0
xxcesarxx
Let me tell you one thing, you are not alone! We all are here for you! We understand your pain. You love your baby and you know it! Our pets have short lives, the amount of time you spent together here on earth was short but you will spend eternity with your baby. Stay strong, it won't be easy but your baby doesn't want to see you sad.

Cesar
Quote 0 0
xxcesarxx
I love the pic with carrot, how cute!
Quote 0 0
Puppyluv
Thank you!
Quote 0 0
Olgita256
What a beautiful boy!! Those pictures speak a million words!! He was so loved!!
Some gifts last forever and some a short time... although we don’t have them, we treasure our time. We’ll see them again one sweet lovely day and our maker will say “ Your gift I have kept... he’s well and alive... I know you have missed him..I know you have cried. Now go and embrace him and take your sweet time there’s no need to rush here there’s no sense of time..you see this is heaven..it’s eternal... your boy is alive!!”

May the beautiful memories live in your heart and give you comfort until that day comes.
I lost my boy October 21 2017. He battled Cushings for 1 1/2 years. He was 15 1/2 but it seems we always want more time. It’s been 6 months and I want you to know that time does help. I thought I would never heal... it was a tough road.. had to seek counseling but time has helped. We will always question ourself... what if... maybe this or coulda shoulda done that... the day will come when we accept and understand that it is done and we did our best. Our hearts and life’s will never be the same. Prayers for you!!!
Quote 0 0
Puppyluv
❤ thank you
Quote 0 0
Robsy
I'm so, so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby, Brady, What a beautiful dog he was. I know it is absolutely heartbreaking to say goodbye and the sadness can seem so relentless. I hope you find someone to talk to who can support you. I hope too that your sadness will be soon soothed by the love you have for your baby and by all the wonderful memories you have of him...and of course all your precious photos. Sending you hugs, Robyn 

Quote 0 0
chyron24
So sorry for your loss of Brady.  You did the right thing, when he was in pain.  Love is letting go.
I lost Rainbow on 4/22nd.  What you feel is exactly as I do.  The pain is so bad, the sadness, the crying, Mind in a mess.  Meltdown.  Regrets. Angry at myself.  Totally feel alone.  But you are not alone, because we are sharing the same feelings.  So, we are together joined by the unbearable pain of losing a beloved pet, who loved us unconditionally.  Sorry I don't know your name?  The home feels totally empty, and filled with despair.  Please share your thoughts and feelings with me, because I think we can really help each other get thru this awful time.  Our hearts are heavy with grief, and we loved so deeply.  The greater the love, the greater the loss, the deeper the grief.  Please know you did the best you could for Brady.  Sometimes, a pup is dealt a bad genetic hand, and they find the right pet parent to love them to the end, no matter how short or long their life. Hugs to you.  We cannot get around it, have to go thru it, and somehow come out the other side, either fractured or in one piece.  Typing thru tears.
Blessings, Arlene
Quote 0 0
Bayley
So sorry for the loss of your beautiful boy.   My boy died in front of me suddenly on Feb. 20 and I was in a very bad way for so long -  its only been in the past few days that I have been able to function without breaking down - some days I cried for hours, now it bubbles up several times a day -  I too had the guilt - when he collapsed I had to make the decision do I take him to our local vet 10 minutes away, or drive him to the emergency vet 30 minutes away.  I took him to the local one thinking time was of the essence (he was unconscious) but unfortunately they misdiagnosed him and he died about 30 minutes later.  I torture myself thinking that if I had gone to the ER, they may have been able to save him.   I keep reliving that last hour and thinking, if only -     Losing my pet is the worst grief I have experienced in the past 25 years -  the two of us lived together  - he was my family - and my home and my life are empty now.   I just try to get through each day one day at a time -  that's it -  trying to hang on until the veil of darkness lifts -  and I'll be able to think of my baby and the good times we had -   He was 13.5 years old but those years passed so quickly.   

Your boy was in pain but it doesn't make it easier to make the decision.  Its one of the hardest things we do in life.  Please hang in there, just take one day at a time to get through, and know there are so many of us who really know what you are experiencing -  you are not alone.  
 

Quote 0 0
Puppyluv
Thank you all for your kind words and incredible support. Yesterday one of my very best friends passed away at 46, today is 1 week Brady has been gone and 2 years since another wonderful friend passed at 46 as well. It has been extremely difficult to cope especially because I have health problems myself and I'll be 46 next month. I know Brady is here with me, in my heart and in spirit as are my friends and family. My heart aches thinking of Brady being gone, more so than a human. That is something few understand, some thing few are blessed enough to know that unconditional love. I wish you all peace in your healing ❤ my cousin is a pet bereavement counselor and she recommend a book called The loss of a pet by Wallace Sife; I highly recommend it.

Best wishes,
Gina
Quote 0 0
COOKIES4
WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU AND I SEND PRAYERS. WE LOST OUR 28 YEARS ALMOST 39 YEAR OLD FEATHER BABY COCKATIEL SPARKY. YES A LONG LIFE, BUT UNEXPECTED. YOUR SADNESS AND CRYING WILL CONTINUE HOWEVER IT WILL EASE A TINY BIT AS YOUR HIGHER POWER ALLOWS. WE ALL BLAME OURSELVES AND CARRY GUILT, ALLOW YOURSELF TI ME TO GRIEVE, I HAVE NOT GONE 2 DAY WITHOUT CRYING. FIND COMFORT IN SMALL THI GS, A CUP OF TEA, COCFEE, LISTENING TO A BOOK, MUSIC MAKES ME VERY SAD, DO I STAY AWAY FROM THAT. YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS AND NEVER FORGET YOUR BABY.
FRIENDS, JOAN AND JIM SPARKY'S MOMMY AND DADDY
Quote 0 0