leakyeyes
It happened about a week and a half ago. He had been struggling with some health issues, but we were in regular contact with the vet and he was being treated. Then I received a text message early one morning that he had suddenly become quite ill and that my mom was going to take him for an emergency vet appointment. She had gone to grab the carrier, but he had a seizure. Once it was over he began to panic and he crawled under a dresser. She called him out and he was trying to come to her, but he just collapsed, let out a final meow and died at her feet. 20 minutes after receiving the message that he was sick, I received a call saying that he had died. I was in shock. I am 19 and we had had him for 14 years. I had grown up with him and honestly imagining a life without him never was in the cards. I pictured him living at least to 20, but he was robbed and I can't help but feel like so was everyone that loved him. He was seriously just the best cat. He had so much love for everyone that came into his life. A few years ago, I was in a really bad place and incredibly depressed. I can't tell you how many times he kept me from doing something. When asked who I would go to when I was upset, he was the answer. He was cuddler and a purrer. He was happy beyond belief. Never was he not smiling! I could go on forever about how amazing he was, but the more I think about it the more torn up I feel inside. Over the past year I have moved out of my house. I went to college, only coming home for brief periods here of there and then once summer came I moved out for good. Home life was often stressful and this summer was just so busy with work and errands that I hadn't been to see my cat since mid May. The week before he passed away, I had a couple chances finally to drop by the house, but I didn't take them and I have never regretted something as much as I do that! It tears me up inside wondering if my cat died thinking that I had left him and forgotten him or that I stopped loving him because none of the above are true! I thought of him all the time! He even was cool enough to have a facebook page where he gained a lot of friends! I am struggling really hard with this loss! I've not lost someone since right before I got him! He has always been there when I needed him most, but I was not there for him and I don't believe I will ever find closure in that!
Quote 0 0
D
I'm very sorry to hear about your loss, and we all know first hand how hard it is to lose our loved ones furry or otherwise.

I was always there for my little cat, but recently I moved to the east coast and brought him with me because I could dare not leave him behind. Less then a week after getting  here he got terribly ill and I had to put him to sleep. I was torn up and still periodically have some terribly sad days thinking about it. I think with love and loss we can't help but dabble in the land of regrets and what if's, I often felt like I wasn't spending enough time with him, and would try to be there for him more.

When he died I felt guilty for dragging him here when he was so old (13+), but now almost a month later I can be more objective about it. He loved me and hung on just to make sure I would be ok where I was.

Leakyeyes your little one loved you, maybe he missed you the last year or so, but you can't live in what if's. Try to focus on the love he gave you and vice versa. 14 is a long life for a kitty, but in truth to us, there is no perfect number, we'd have them live forever if it was our choice.

I wish you the best as you try to recover and hope that my words have brought you at least some measure of solace.
Quote 0 0
smkovalinsky
I am so sorry for your loss.  Losing a fur family member is agony like no other.
I know your pain:   I too feel I took my dog for granted.  Like you,  I figured he had many years ahead. I missed many opportunities to spend more time with him.

I think they forgive us, though;  I think your kitty loves you and feels loved in return and is still connected to you in spirit.  He was in your thoughts and you made him a Facebook page -  in his own way, he knows this.  Continue to think of him and talk to him.  Love never really dies;  it just changes form.
Quote 0 0