Turtle
I am feeling so depleted and so alone. I need my family back. Sometimes I think I have lost my reason for living. I want them so badly. My life feels so empty without them here. And I don't know what to do to feel any better. 

I just need them back, and the feeling of aloneness and grief is unbearable. 

I know everyone understands, and thank you for that.

Turtle
Swr
Quote 0 0
nina555
Hello Turtle..please keep reaching out here....I am feeling the same way....yesterday I was numb and almost thought I must be moving on...and then today that horrible emptiness....please, if it will help, tell us about your family.....and also, I talked to a pet grief counsellor the day after it happened...a phone consult...it was invaluable...it doesnt ease the pain or take it away but he at least told me that what Im feeling,,,,and what you are feeling...is normal....we just need to let it out....and reach out if we can.    Hugs
Quote 0 0
Turtle
Thanks for your thoughts. When I said "family" I meant my cat family. I have no other family.

I know that numbness. Sometimes I just can't believe they are gone, sometimes I don't think about it, and then it comes over me in waves and I collapse emotionally.

This is a different kind of grief than when I lost my parents. Worse, for me, perhaps because my family was  not close and I hardly saw them after age 18. My cats were always there, completely trusting in their dependence on me.

Unlike we humans, the cats can always be trusted to be honest and be just what they are - cats, without guile or deceit or betrayal. WIth them, we have a pure relationship, not hampered by the complications of human relationships.

I think part of the huge loneliness we feel is the loss of that very safe place the cats create for us (and that we create for them).

THanks again for answering. I have no one to talk to about it, and it helps so much to share here.
Swr
Quote 0 0
nina555
Turtle....yes that is such a lovely insight.....a safe place that we share only with our pets....a relationship so pure and innocent and sweet....which we rarely find with humans.  I loved all those moments with my dog Cody...I would say to him "Are you going to take me out now to a cafe?"....and I would often prefer his company to anyone else's...we get to see a world through their eyes..and they share that with us so beautifully.  I am sad for anyone who says they don't like dogs or cats  and live a life without ever feeling such a gift of companionship.  I had a cat too...and a chihuahua cross....and when my partner and I broke up, I had their names tattooed on my shoulder in a loveheart shape..I am so not a tattoo person....:)  so now I have Bella (the cat), Coco (chihuahua) and Cody (the one just passed) written on my shoulder.
Quote 0 0
Danny99
Just wanted you to know you are not alone. My joy was coming home to see my girl. Even through the end of her sickness she would get out of bed to greet me. Now I am empty. To smell her and see her again. My heart is aching
Quote 0 0
JoyAlane
Our fur babies are so special, giving unconditional love. Yes, my babies are my family. My little Rowdy passed last August 6th. It left me devasted and depressed. I felt people (most) didn't understand. They minimize the love, devotion and importance of these beautiful beings in our life. Rowdy would have been 18 yrs. Old in November. That's much longer than most people have stood by me. I went into a depression. Stayed in bed most of the time. I found a book that helped me gain focus again and give me hope. "Biblical Proof Animals Go To Heaven" by Steven Woodward. Also, a great help, a book by Niki Shanahan," Pet Loss Is Heaven's Gain." Maybe you would be interested in reading them. God Bless You. I hope this helps.
Quote 0 0
Romeos_Daddy
You are not alone Turtle.  I lost my sweet Romeo over 3 months ago and I still miss him so much it feels like I can't breath at times.  Like the wind gets knocked out of me.  It's been a roller coaster ride of emotions and some times are good and positive with great memories that bring smiles and then there are periods of great depression caused by the emptiness and longing that comes with the cruel reality of not knowing how I will get through the rest of the year, not to mention the rest of my life without him.  
You'll get through this Turtle, we all will.  But it will be hard.  Take it one day at a time and if that seems like too long, take it one minute at a time.  I heard grief is the place we put love that we can't express anymore and I know how much I loved Romeo while he was here so I know the grief will be with me for the rest of my life in some way.  Longing for the day that pictures and memories don't make me sad.     
Aaron
Quote 0 0