I am in a sad sad place and dealing with my first loss.

We got Georgie almost two years ago. He was a stray and we rescued him from the local shelter. We already had one pup- Luna, and they instantly bonded. They are both small mixes. George was anxious and scared of a lot. Through a lot of bonding, training, and some medication he blossomed into the happiest and sweetest boy. In May I gave birth to our first child. George bonded with him immediately. He showered him with kisses and made him laugh all day. George would play with his toys and make our son laugh endlessly.

On Thursday I got a frantic call at work. The dog walker we have used for years has 3 other employees. One of her employees was walking the dogs when George got very upset by a large dog on the other side of the road. I was told he got out of his harness, hit by a car, and was being brought to the vet. I ran out of work and got there within minutes. I met our original dog walker (the owner) there and waited for the other woman to bring George. I ran to her car and grabbed him from the front seat. I ran George into the vet as fast as I could. They tried everything but he didn’t make it.

The vet told me that his injuries were so severe that he most likely passed right away. She said even if he didn’t, he was unconscious for a moment or two and not in any pain. The vet cleaned him up and we were able to spend some time saying goodbye to him.

I feel broken. Luna is looking all over for him and seems lost. I haven’t slept since it happened or stopped crying. I feel so much guilt. George never really liked walks and we always had him go because we thought the exercise was good for him. We should have made his harness tighter. We should have protected him. We didn’t. There’s a hole in our hearts. I never thought this much pain was possible. I’m trying to be ok since we have a baby at home, but it hurts too much. Tomorrow we leave Luna for the first time to go back to work and I’m so worried about her during the day. And I’m so worried about letting her go on a walk. She loves walks more than anything. I know it’s important we keep her routine the same but how do I not just panic that this will happen again?

Does this ever get better?
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Omg I am so sorry for your loss. I thought it was traumatic to have to put my dog down 2 wks ago but I just can't imagine how much worse it must be for you to lose your baby that way. George is so cute. All I can say is you have to take it day by day as I have. We don't know why some things happen the way they do. It's hard to make sense of any of it. Coming on here has helped me. I don't know what more to say since I just can't think clearly right now myself. Hugs
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GeorgiesMom - I am so, so sorry for your horrendous loss. It's clear you were a wonderfully loving mum for George, and that under your care he blossomed to enjoy a life filled with sustaining human and animal companionship and happiness (including with your first child born in May).

It's especially difficult when you question whether you could have done things differently. There are no easy answers, but the depth of your concern, responsibility, and love for George come shining through in your self-interrogation.

I lost my dear cat Sammi in early Oct this year - he was struck by a car, and as a young cat of 2.5 years, I was devastated by how soon he'd been taken from me. 

Forum members know how harrowing the grief and guilt can be. Please be compassionate with yourself, and continue to share with us your feelings as you work your way through this loss.

Sending you my deepest sympathies, and wishes for peaceful thoughts today. 
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Sending my deepest condolences. I am truly sorry for your loss.

You were a loving pet parent and you did everything you could. I wish I knew what else to say apart from the fact that you have come to the right place to express your grief.  You will feel a connection with all of the people on here who will understand your pain..

Beautiful pictures of your pup.

sending you comfort and peace.


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