I totally understand what you're going through and even though I've had a strong belief/Faith all my life in God, and have lost animals in the past, I've never worried so much until my lil soulmate Ginger passed 7/4/16. I had her 12 yrs and we had a connection, I could never fully explain in words. I worried so much about her spirit, I'd say the 1st 3-4 weeks after she left me, because i believe if she had a choice she would have stayed with me. Right after she passed, I started researching about pets going to heaven. I wanted to make sure she was alright. I read mixed things but now i choose to only read what helps me and is in line with my belief. That there is a heaven and that since God created animals, then surely He will have them in Heaven waiting for us. If you want me to private message you with some articles that truly helped me, just let me know and I'll copy the webpages for you. If they don't gp along with your beliefs, as we all have different beliefs, then I totally understand. Either way, I wish you peace in letting her go. It doesn't mean you will ever forget her. A love bond can never be broken. I call it accepting what is. I still have meltdowns, even last night, some days I can accept, sometimes an hour will hit, where i cannot accept she's gone. Grief is very confusing but we love our pets so strongly so it makes sense. I know that if anyone deserved heaven, my Angel did and I am sure your Angel's spirit is doing just fine, out of any pain, and wants you to be happy.
Denise (Sweet Ginger's Mom)