I found this website and very much need to share the story of Fuzz.  He was an amazing cat who died on Friday at just 13 months of age.  I am completely shattered.  I keep seeing reminders of him around the house and breaking down.

About a year ago, I found two tiny kittens in my yard.  I took them to the humane society and it was found they were 3-4 weeks of age, with eye infections and respiratory infections.  They guessed that their Mama had likely abandoned them because of their poor health.  We fostered them and adopted them.  My son named them Fuzz and Puffball.  

Fuzz was such an amazing cat!  I have 4 children, and he was nothing but gentle with them.  He was friendly to everyone who visited and always ready to purr.  One quirk was that his tail would lay flat on his back as he walked.  He loved his brother, Puffball, so much, and they were always together.  When Puffball got outside, Fuzz would wander around, crying, trying to find him.  One time he was jumping repeatedly at the door, trying to open it and get out to Puffball!

Late on Thursday, after everyone else was asleep, my husband noticed cat vomit and Fuzz meowing in distress.  He told me first thing on Friday morning and I called our vet.  They scheduled us for 10:40.  By 9:30, we knew he was in a lot of trouble.  He lay in my son's diaper bin, just crying so pitifully.  So I took him to the vet immediately.  The vet told me he had a bladder blockage, but that they could do a procedure with a catheter and he'd be in the hospital for the weekend, but then ok.  So I left him.  I was upset about the cost at that time ($2000) and worried about his recovery, and I feel so mad at myself for that now.  I expected him to be ok.  He had hidden his pain so well.

Around 1:30, the vet called, and told me that both she and the other vet at the clinic were unable to clear the blockage.  There was an option of another surgery at a clinic in another city.  She called around for quotes, and he couldn't get in anywhere for a week!  The cost was estimated at $6000 (on top of the $2000 already spent).  The vet was concerned about re-occurance since such a bad blockage had happened to such a young cat.  

We made the painful decision to put him down.  I feel terrible guilt, but he would have spent a week in misery waiting for surgery, had a tough recovery, and it could have happened again.  And we don't have that much money.

Puffball is upset.  He is looking everywhere for Fuzz.  My husband and I are randomly crying when we think of him.  I am embarrassed and angry that my kids are NOT upset (and then I am mad at myself for that feeling).  I can't believe this happened to us and so quickly.  He was a healthy, happy, very young cat and then all of a sudden he's gone.  Why didn't he let us know sooner?  I miss him so much.
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Wow, that is a very tough loss and it must feel so unfair to lose such a beloved, young cat! I am so, so sorry, Jennifer. 

My heart goes out to you very much. I hope it will help to write and connect here. People are very caring and they well understand the awful pain you're suffering.  I wish that healing our hearts didn't take so long. Be extra gentle with yourself while your grief is so raw. Hugs to you!
-Missing Marissa deeply
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Jennifer, I am sorry about your loss.  Our pets' threshold for pain is immense, and since they don't "talk human" is impossible for us to know, what is going on with them.  By the time we find out, it can be early enough to do something or late and hardly anything can be done.  Also, most of us struggle with our finances.  I truly believe that everyone in this forum have done all that they could do for their beloved pets.  Also, everyone grieves differently, when my beloved Sol (doggie) left me....I was so sad, did not want to do anything, but husband said "we were so lucky to have him for eleven years, he was loved and he loved you and protected you all of his life, you were blessed" -
at the time, I was not able to comprehend,, I believe that, I was blessed and lucky to have this wonderful creature in my life, for all of his life he gave nothing but LOVE.  Now, Sol lives and is secured in my heart.

Some of us have our pets for a long time  - never enough - and some of us for a short period of time - never enough --. The loss feels the same, the pain is the same.  Be kind to yourself.
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