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Luke_03
I lost my 13 year old girl Darcy in May. I thought I was ready to adopt and everyone around me was saying I need a dog. Saturday I got a 2-4 year old beagle mix and Darcy was a golden retriever lab mix. So I got a completely different bread. She’s been hit before and was left on the side of the road in a box. Having her I think maybe in never want another dog. But I made a commitment to this dog and I brought her into my home. We have had a few growing pains but things will get better. She has abandonment issues and I in no way want to add to that. And I have to love her as much as I can being in my home. These first few weeks may be hard but I hope to be able to deal with my crazy thoughts 
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Luke_03
I lost my 13 year old girl Darcy in May. I thought I was ready to adopt and everyone around me was saying I need a dog. Saturday I got a 2-4 year old beagle mix and Darcy was a golden retriever lab mix. So I got a completely different bread. She’s been hit before and was left on the side of the road in a box. Having her I think maybe in never want another dog. But I made a commitment to this dog and I brought her into my home. We have had a few growing pains but things will get better. She has abandonment issues and I in no way want to add to that. And I have to love her as much as I can being in my home. These first few weeks may be hard but I hope to be able to deal with my crazy thoughts
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Quincysmomma
@Luke_03 - Thanks for sharing your story...I really understand what you are saying.  I'm having growing pains with my new pup as well and he's so different from my Quincy, but I think that will turn out to be a good thing...if they were too similar it might be even harder having a different dog in our home. I've only said this to my husband because it might make me sound like a terrible person, but the more time we have with new pup, Frankie, makes me realize what a rare dog Quincy was....I think he was a once in a lifetime dog and I'm so grateful we had 11 yrs with him. That being said, Frankie deserves a good home as well and he definitely has some abandonment issues too so we're just hoping that time will build his confidence in us and he'll realize that he's home now.  Good luck with your new pup...this is a very emotional process.
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ClaudiaNYC
Quincysmomma,

My sweet cat Jessie hasn't even been gone four days and already my friends are pushing me to adopt another cat. They mean well, but part of me wishes they would knock it off with that talk. I can't even entertain the thought right now.
It's those feelings of "betrayal" you mentioned that are like a big brick wall in my mind. My home, my garden, are Jessie's turf. Now and forever. She was the spiritual center of my little corner of the world. I feel like if I were to adopt another cat, that my ability to bond with it will be compromised by my intense loyalty to Jessie.

I wish I had more helpful feedback to offer you. I can say that I will most likely, as some point, probably adopt a cat in need of home. But when that will happen I don't know.

The photo of Quincy is absolutely endearing! I can see clearly how special he was. What a sweetheart.
I believe that your new dog will carve out his place in your heart gradually, over time. He is his own individual, and he wants your love, but surely he will allow you to take you time, since both of you are in an adjustment period. Your feelings are totally natural. 

Wishing you comfort ... everything will be ok.

Claudia
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Quincysmomma
Claudia - thank you so much for your response and I'm so sorry for the loss of your kitty...losing our fur babies is the hardest thing I've ever dealt with honestly. I don't know for sure if you'll know when you're ready for another kitty because I still don't know if I was ready when we adopted Frankie and that was 5 months after we lost Quincy, but I'm hoping things will work out. Someone up thread said maybe Quincy had a hand in bringing Frankie into our lives and I like that thought.  (even though he's been a challenge so far) :)

Not many people in my life understood the depth of grief for losing Quincy but we all definitely understand it here. I'm sure their intentions were good with mentioning getting another kitty but, in my opinion, is also dismissive of the grief you feel what was lost.  Critters are not interchangeable...they all have different personalities and they can never be replaced.  That's one thing my therapist told me to write on a sticky note when I started thinking about adopting another dog. That I was not looking to replace Quincy, but was looking to add a new member to our family.

Take care and again, I'm so sorry for the loss of your Jessie.
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