Memories_of_Marmalade



Greetings everyone,
 
Today (Thursday, August 29th, 2019)  it has been 15 weeks since my cat "Marmalade" departed this World. 
 
As many here on the forum know, if you have read some of our story, "Marmalade" brought me back to faith, after I had been an atheist or agnostic for over 50 years. I witnessed him survive the odds countless times, when he shouldn't have. And when I was being abandoned by everyone, and really needed a friend, "Marmalade's" path was crossed with mine by a higher power. I am certain of it. Without "Marmalade's" presence, I would not have survived the last several, very difficult years. I owe him my life many times over.
 
I just wrote this little prayer below in honor of my lost love "Marmalade." Each time that I feel an emotion or feeling that is "negative", I try and replace it with one that is "positive." So I wrote this prayer below, to try and remind myself of what I should be feeling instead, if I truly want to heal and recover. The goal is to give oneself ongoing, positive affirmations.

I hope some of you find comfort in it. Even if you are not spiritual.
 
Kindest regards,
James
 
 
 
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Dear Merciful God,
 
Please take my "grief" from me and replace it with feelings of only "gratitude"
 
For my path being crossed with that of my lost loved one, and our being given the opportunity to get to know one another.
 
Please take my "sadness" away from me and replace it with feelings of being "blessed"
 
For the time that was allotted to my lost beloved and I, to be together.
 
Please take my "guilt" from me and replace it with feeling "humbled"
 
For having known such great and unconditional love in my lifetime.
 
Please take my "depression" away and replace it with feelings of "joy & happiness"
 
For all the smiles & laughter that my lost love provided me with, during the time that we were together.
 
Please take my "anxiety & anguish" away from me and replace them with feelings of "inner peace"
 
For my lost loved one having enriched my life so, so fully, while they were present.
 
Please take my "loneliness" away and replace it with feelings of deep "contentment"
 
For all the days and nights that I knew real companionship with my lost beloved.
 
Please take away my "regrets" and replace them with feelings of "bravery & courage"
 
To be able to face and endure my loss, and allow myself to heal and recover.
 
Please forgive me for needing help to remember that which is so evident above.
 
Thank you for showing me such great mercy through these dark & difficult times.
 
Amen
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Bibbi
This is so beautifully expressed, and so accurate; I will use this for myself aswell - thank you very much!
How wonderful if we can find our way to feeling like this even while grieving; or maybe in between the waves of despair, a reminder to be grateful for what we had and experienced, and to carry the love onward...
Beautiful!
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JinglesMom
Memories_of_Marmalade wrote:



Greetings everyone,
 
Today (Thursday, August 29th, 2019)  it has been 15 weeks since my cat "Marmalade" departed this World. 
 
As many here on the forum know, if you have read some of our story, "Marmalade" brought me back to faith, after I had been an atheist or agnostic for over 50 years. I witnessed him survive the odds countless times, when he shouldn't have. And when I was being abandoned by everyone, and really needed a friend, "Marmalade's" path was crossed with mine by a higher power. I am certain of it. Without "Marmalade's" presence, I would not have survived the last several, very difficult years. I owe him my life many times over.
 
I just wrote this little prayer below in honor of my lost love "Marmalade." Each time that I feel an emotion or feeling that is "negative", I try and replace it with one that is "positive." So I wrote this prayer below, to try and remind myself of what I should be feeling instead, if I truly want to heal and recover. The goal is to give oneself ongoing, positive affirmations.

I hope some of you find comfort in it. Even if you are not spiritual.
 
Kindest regards,
James
 
 
 
---------------------------------------------
 
 
 
 
 
Dear Merciful God,
 
Please take my "grief" from me and replace it with feelings of only "gratitude"
 
For my path being crossed with that of my lost loved one, and our being given the opportunity to get to know one another.
 
Please take my "sadness" away from me and replace it with feelings of being "blessed"
 
For the time that was allotted to my lost beloved and I to be together.
 
Please take my "guilt" from me and replace it with feeling "humbled"
 
For having known such great and unconditional love in my lifetime.
 
Please take my "depression" away and replace it with feelings of "joy & happiness"
 
For all the smiles & laughter that my lost love provided me with, during the time that we were together.
 
Please take my "anxiety" away from me and replace it with feelings of "inner peace"
 
For my lost loved one having enriched my life so, so fully while they were present.
 
Please take my "loneliness" away and replace it with feelings of deep "contentment"
 
For all the days and nights that I knew real companionship with my lost beloved.
 
Please take away my "regrets" and replace them with feelings of "courage"
 
To be able to face and endure my loss and allow myself to heal and recover.
 
Please forgive me for needing help to remember that which is so evident.
 
Thank you for showing me such mercy.
 
Amen
Pamela Lynne Crawford
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JinglesMom
Dear James,

Well my friend all I have to say is AMEN!  Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful and heartfelt poem with us. The words you wrote were absolutely perfect, and I am sure that so many who are going through this struggle of grief will be able to take such comfort from your writing. I know that I am going to use this prayer in my everyday life. It is just so positive and it is filled with a really beautiful spirit, and I think that must come from you, and your strong, loyal, and valiant Marmalade. The angels are indeed sending these beautiful words so filled with such feeling and emotion to our God above when we say them, of this I have no doubt. I have always taken refuge in my faith, no matter what has transpired in my life, He has always been there to either throw me that lifeline, or teach me how to swim.

Sometimes when we feel that we are going under, we just need to reach out, and pray. I remember vividly that cold dark  night in January, when my boy Jingles was struggling with every single breath, and he looked so scared and I have never felt more helpless and alone in my life. Here I was watching my boy in pain with such a panicked look in his eyes, and there was absolutely nothing I could do, and then I knew in my heart what needed to be done, and I used every ounce of courage I had, and I prayed for God to take my baby home, and within a few seconds of that prayer, my beloved boy was finally at peace. When we have done all we can, and when our back is against the wall, there is only one place to turn, and He has never let me down. My sweet Jingles went straight from my arms to my Lord's embrace, and his suffering was no more, but then mine began with a vengeance.

Your Marmalade was there for you when no one else was, and his path was crossed with yours by a higher power. I know he beat the odds so many times, and that is why we always need to believe, and we will receive so many blessings. In my lifetime, I have been so awed by seeing miracles happen, with no scientific causes and no logical explanations, and then all I have to do is look deep within me and know who it was. I begged God to let me see my little Pootie Tang one more time, just one more time, and the odds of that happening were next to none, as she was so ill and wandering around in the elements, and on the third night of when she went missing, lo and behold, she came to my door to say one final goodbye. I was given what I had asked for in the face of so many obstacles, she came back home to me, and I was so grateful, and I know who was at work there.

I loved how you replaced gratitude for grief and being blessed for sadness, inner peace for anxiety, and contentment for loneliness, and I could go on and on, but this is one poem that should not be analyzed, it needs to be read, and it needs to be said, and it needs to be felt.  Bravo James for writing this absolutely perfect prayer straight from your heart and soul, so that we will be able to find hope and promise for the future. So it has been 15 weeks since your special boy crossed over into his new world, and look what a difference he has made in your life, and in ours. Thank you James for giving us something to hold on to in the cold of night when we are looking for my little ones and they are not there, thank you for giving us something to hold onto when we feel that all is lost and will never be the same again, thank you giving us something to hold onto in the midst of the raging storm, and thank you for giving us these beautiful words to say to help us find our way out of the darkness and into the light. You did good James, you did good Marmalade, you two are still quite the team, making this world a much better place, and helping so many hurting hearts find the hope and peace they have been searching for so long to let the healing begin. Well Done James and Marmalade! Hugs to you both, Pamela
Pamela Lynne Crawford
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FClaire
Thankyou James for sharing your beautiful poem. I am also going to try and use this myself xxx
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kmayo99
Thank you for sharing James. I love your posts and the advice you give me and to others. Much love.
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Rosanne777
A very beautiful poem and thanks for sharing it with all of us!
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CeeCeesMom
Hi James, that's a beautiful prayer you've written.  You always write so eloquently.  Thank you for sharing it.

CeeCeesMom
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anang
James,

Your words are breathtaking and express your feelings in such incredibly emotional words. Your love for Marmalade is palpable, for anyone who has ever read your posts. You bring your boy, son, best friend, to life for those of us who never had the pleasure of meeting him. Your words personify the bliss, anguish, gratitude, and multitude of other emotions that have besieged you throughout the last 10 weeks, as well as the years that you spent with Marmalade. Your writings have given me, and a multitude of other members here a warm patch of sun, a place to grieve openly, to read a sentiment that we may not be able to express.

Thank you for sharing this,
Katie
K. Unger
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anang
15 weeks, not 10. My apologies. Grief is like a timeless abyss to me. I can't keep track of it properly.
-Katie
K. Unger
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Memories_of_Marmalade


Good evening everyone who commented above, 

I just wanted to thank you all for your very meaningful comments and positive responses. They mean the World to me. I so appreciate your taking the time to read the prayer I wrote and to respond so warmly and kindly.

Again, I thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my broken heart. You are all helping me to put the broken pieces of it back together again.

May God bless and keep you. 

XO

My very best regards,
James
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Jasmines_Mom
Thank you for this, James.  Very beautiful.
I miss you every minute of every day, my sweet baby Jasmine.
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Memories_of_Marmalade


Dear Jasmines_Mom,

Thank YOU for taking the time to read and respond with your very kind comment.

My kindest regards,
James
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Gertie
Thank you so much for sharing your story and poem. I hope you find peace and joy in your life again. Just know your little kitty is watching over you and loving you from afar.
Sending hugs your way.

Gertie.
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