Chancesmom
I already have 2 of the most wonderful female pups Beijing Tiananmen is 8 and Molly Maguire who is 7.  Beijing is a Husky/Dalmatian mix Molly is a Rottie/Black Lab mix.  I was at work and one of my friends told me about a Black Lab that was abused and neglected his X owners were giving him away or going to have him put 2 sleep and I could not ever let that happen I have a weak heart when it comes 2 abused animals.   They brought Chance 2 the house and the first thing that I fell in love with was his big paws they were so adorable, then when he met me the first thing he did was poop on the carpet, no big deal he was nervous and I do understand that.  I did have 2 cage him it was the biggest cage we could find he was aggressive then which he was nervous again he used 2 live in a crate for 8 years. About 3 weeks later after my alpha female met him as well as my other pup we let him out to walk freely around the house. We had him for about 3 months before I was laid off and got 2 work with him and spend more time with him, that is when the bite happened after the 30seconds he held on 2 my wrist and let go he ran and hid. I am positive he would have beating for this at the other place, but I never would or could touch him I love him 2 much and he was my baby boy.  

Then I came home from the hospital it all changed he was a complete different pup and was more trusting, I could brush him over time, give him a pill by opening his mouth.  He loved dinner time, he sounded like he was tap dancing for he was so excited 2 eat, when he got here I had 2 hand feed him he had no idea how 2 eat from a bowl.  He taught me so much, that ppl and animals can change, all he needed was love and affection and trust and I think that we both gave that 2 him, except my husband he was scared of him.  Never trusted him.  Chance and I were working and giving kisses and the day before he did he did give me a kiss and that is the last part of love that he gave me and I will remember till the day that I die.  We have Chance 4 ever now he was cremated and is beside my first pup Chyna that passed away 6 yrs ago.  My heart and soul are empty and I can not explain how this feels, it is like there is a void in my life and I am so empty inside with out him.  I love him and my Chyna so much and miss them both so much.  Thank you for listening and understanding.  RIP Chyna and Chance I miss you both and love u both so very very much.  
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donnalee

What a great mom you were to Chance.  I know the empty feeling as well that they leave.  I'm so sorry you are having to go through this at this time.  I'm so glad Chance was able to experience a good, loving home and get to know you so very, very well. 

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Chancesmom
Donnalee, 

Thank you so much 4 your kind words and you do what I am going through with the emptiness. , broken heart and the void that he left. I just loved him so much and of course the guilt is there, I did not love him enough, I did I do something wrong, I just can not get over the guilt.  If I can or when I go 2 the Rainbow Bridge, my worry is that he will not be there 2 greet me and he will be with the other family and leave me there alone and he will also leave my Chyna alone.  So Chyna and I will not see him again, this may sound stupid, but that is how I feel.  Chyna was my lil baby girl who passed away 6 years ago and I still morn her just like Chance, so I have 2 empty voids on my heart and crushed. Thank u 4 listening that helps me  
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nicokudo
Chance's mom,

I'm so sorry about the loss of your precious big boy.  I don't think you have anything to worry about at RB.  He will come to you.  You are his real mom, the one who showed him love when he tested you with those bites.  He loved you in life and loves you still.  I know what you mean about feeling empty and alone. Grieving is a solitary experience.  Even if another grieves with you, you still feel alone.

I remember someone coming to this site many years ago with a pet called Chyna.  I loved the spelling of the name.  Was that you?

Remember, your baby loves you.

Karen



Karen,Kudo and Nico's mom
Earth mom to Marco and Bella
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Chancesmom
Karen, 
yes I am the same person that lost my lil girl Chyna 6 years ago I can not believe
it has been 6 years when she passed away.  I do still morn her so much when ever I talk 
her it starts the tears pouring.  Thank you for remembering me 
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GrievingGinger
I'm so sorry for your loss :(  It hurts so much to lose a loved one, especially a precious fur-baby.  The loneliness is very hard and takes time to get use too. 

It sounds like you were an amazing person to rescue this dog and help him overcome his aggression.  I am positive he is still with you looking down upon you and will help you through this.

Feel free to post as often as you like.  There are a lot of compassionate caring people here who understand the loss you are feeling.

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donnalee
Wow, I'm pretty impressed that Karen recognized Chyna's name from 6 years ago! 
ChancesMom, my heart goes out to you, having two great loves at the RB. 
I know that when our heart is so full of grief and pain, our minds can run rampant.  It happens to all of us at some time.  I'm glad you are honest with us about what you are thinking and  I hope you won't be upset with me for sharing my thought about one thing with you.   You say that you fear Chance will be with the other family at RB.  I think you are so emotionally distraught right now that maybe your thinking is clouded by sadness.   That other family abused him, they were going to give him away or have him put to sleep.  There was no love bond there.  Our furbabies know LOVE when they have it.  They want to love and to be loved like all of us.  YOU took him in and gave him a real home and real love.   Chance knows who loved him and that is who he will be with at RB.  And that is YOU!  Just think about who you want to be with at RB / Heaven-----people who were mean to you or people who loved you?  You know the answer.  Our furbabies are no different.
I don't know your beliefs and I'm not trying to spread mine but I like to share some things I have read since losing Scottie.  One lady who died (clinically dead) and was revived said that the first being she met on the other side was her DOG who she loved with all her heart and had passed a few months prior.  I truly do believe we will be reunited with them and it will be wonderful.  You will probably be knocked over since there will be two beautiful angel dogs running to meet you and jump on you and kiss you with excitement!
I know none of that  helps with your heart that is breaking in two right now.  Nothing can take away the emptiness and sadness that you feel now from losing him.  For that, we can only be here for you to lean on and cry on for as long as you need.    We understand what you are going through and care for you.  I'm saying prayers for you ChancesMom.  You were such a good Mom and he loves you so much. 
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