Hutchysmom
Not nearly enough time with my Hutchy. We put him down today and I am devastated. I can’t stop crying. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. It was time, I couldn’t bear to see him uncomfortable any longer. But I walked him in there and he stopped to sniff the grass. I can’t get that image out of my head. It is breaking my heart. I keep looking for him in the house, in his usual “spots.” He’s not underfoot when I’m in the kitchen, hoping to catch a scrap. How can he not be with us any longer.

He was with me through many joys, and heartaches too. 15 years isn’t long enough.
Quote 0 0
Mybeautifulboy
You are right it is never long enough. It is hard to understand why the ones that give us so much joy and unconditional love leave us so soon.
I promise you that things will get better. Just hang in there and be kind to yourself.

My condolences on your loss.
Quote 0 0
Sil
Hutchysmom,

I am very sorry for your loss of Hutchy.  Someone said a while ago, "Doggies have only one flaw... they don't live long enough".  They are with us, following us, looking into our eyes, and give us an amazing unconditional love.  Your love for your sweet Hutchy will stay with you forever.  I always say, that, "the best pictures I have, are the ones, I took with my heart".... and, I know that you have wonderful pictures, of your sweet Hutchy.  It feels unreal, and the pain is immense, I know, but you are not alone.  Sending you hugs.
Quote 0 0
HamLuv16
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my Hammy on Sunday and the pain and grief is unbelievable.
Quote 0 0
Zaneta
I’m sorry for your loss. My Bella drowned last week. She was 14,5. I feel your hurt.
Quote 0 0
Julia_Loves_McCartney
I'm very sorry for your loss. It's hard to not see them in their usual places around the house. And I wish they lived as long as we do. Sending prayers your way.

~I love you eternally, McCartney boy~

You can visit my kitty McCartney's Rainbow Bridge Memorial here: http://www.rainbowbridge.com/residents/MCCAR001/Resident.htm

Quote 0 0
Hutchysmom
This morning I woke up early (I’m a nurse) as I usually do. I came downstairs and realized Hutchy was not going to be there waiting for breakfast. I looked out into the living room and didn’t see him sleeping. He didn’t get up to greet me. He didn’t come over as I packed the kids lunches. I went to work and fought back tears. When I got to my car at the end of my day I sobbed. I miss him so much. I keep thinking of his last day with us. I am just so sad.
Quote 0 0
LUCYLULU

Oh Hutchysmom~

I am very sorry to read about your Hutchy. And you are so right-- 15 years is definitely not long enough. Having to make the decision is wicked. I had to chose for my Lucy. I replayed the decision, the last day...everything. And like Hutchy, I had a fierce recall, an image when my Lucy looked @ me. The tech took her out of the room for the first of 2 shots. She looked at me as if to say, 'I'll be right back'. Like Hutchy sniffing the grass, Lucy looked if this is another routine day/visit. Even coming back into the room with the vet...for the second shot...Lucy tried to walk toward me & then sort of fell down onto the blanket on the floor. My vet loved Lucy too. She was already crying herself. But Lucy wasn't afraid. She trusted me...in those last moments...we were together. Whether people stay in the room or not is their own decision.But I share this with you because in time, I hope you will be able to feel that being with Hutchy on that last day...was a gift. He wasn't alone. Even sniffing the grass, he wasn't afraid. He trusted you. Hutchy knew that you didn't want him to suffer. You chose to end his pain because you loved him beyond measure. You took his pain. And now you feel the pain of that last day & the unbearable decision. Now you carry the pain. But in that moment, when you chose to end his suffering, you decided because you loved him that much.

Please keep talking to Hutchy. Ask him for signs & then watch for them. They will come. But for now...please go slow. Many people may not understand. But everyone who has shared the deep love with a furry friend understands the fierce pain. Everyone here understands. Come often. If & when you are ready, please share more about your Hutchy.

Big hugs,
Kasey

Quote 0 0
Hutchysmom
Thank you Kasey. Thank for sharing that. I didn’t think of that, and it does help. I hope that in time that last day won’t be what I think of when I think of him. I’m sitting in the family room where he always was, and it feels so empty. Hutchy was a beautiful, sweet dog. He was 9 weeks old when we rescued him. He welcomed home our 3 children, was with me when my father died and never left our side. He was simply the most gentle, sweet dog. Perfect disposition. He loved to chase and catch tennis balls, long naps and any food scraps he might catch. It’s so hard to be in this house without him, the loss is palpable. I heard my son crying in his bed last night (he’s 8). We are all just so sad.

Thank you all for your kind words. At times I feel silly grieving the way I am, but this forum makes it better.
Quote 0 0