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PeanutWee

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Reply with quote  #1 
It was 15 months ago yesterday that my beautiful chihuahua Peanut went to the bridge. She was 13 years old. I miss her more every day, more than I have words for and I still cry for her every day. She will always be my bestest friend.

Just before Peanut's one year angel-versary, she led us to Heidi who reminds me of Peanut in gentle and subtle ways. Heidi is a nice a little friend and we have no regrets that we adopted her.

I try to keep a thread up for Peanut, but I end up deleting them for one reason or another. This last one was the longest time I had one up. Grief is like that I think as we find ways to cope, we keep trying to find our way.

Peace, thanks, and hugs to you all,
Peanut's Mom
 

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MAlcindor

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Reply with quote  #2 
It amazes me how much time passes yet our feelings are still as raw as the first day we lost them. All I have to do to cry is think about my babies and the pain just hits me like a sledge hammer to my gut. I'm so glad you have Heidi. I also adopted a new little friend after my babies passed, his name is Randy. He is very sweet and I have no regrets about helping him either. Everyone has their own way of coping and for me it is keeping the same routines as before my babies passed. Grief is such a long and lonely road.
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Molly_Beagle_Mom_4ever

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Reply with quote  #3 
Hi Peanut’s Mom, 15 months...I know it can seem like yesterday and like an eternity at the same time. These angel-versaries are always very difficult, and I hope Peanut is finding some special little ways to show you that she’s still very near and firmly connected to you. I’m so happy Heidi adopted you, and I’m sure Peanut led you in her direction. No doubt, Peanut is the little leader in everything you do, always showing Heidi the very best of her favorite places.

Sending you, Peanut and Heidi lots of hugs from me and my best girl Molly.

Dawn...Molly’s Mom

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Dalidog

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Reply with quote  #4 
Peanuts Mom....  your post to Peanut was so touching..  I understand the crying every day.  They are tears of love you can't contain.  We will always miss them so.  I'm so happy that Peanut sent you Heidi to love.  Our angels have their way of helping us through dark times.  I know they will always be with us to guide us.

Miss Luna is doing wonderful.  The vet released her on Wednesday after removing all her staples.  She ran to the car and was ready to go home!!!!   We love her so and at over 15 1/2 we know that every day is a blessing.  I so wonder what Dali would have been like at that age.  I hold onto Luna, as she is my connection in so many ways to Dali.

Take care of yourself and Heidi....your Peanut will always be your guide.

Dali's mom

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Merlysmum

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Reply with quote  #5 
Peanut's mum - I know exactly what you are going through. Aug.20 was the one-year anniversary of my shih-pooh Merlin's death. It doesn't get much better/easier, does it? I'm glad you have Heidi. I've been thinking about getting another dog but my roommate has cancer so I've had to take care of her Boston terrier. He's an ok dog but has walking habits I wouldn't want a new dog to follow. He's 10 and strong so taking care of him is no picnic. How does it feel with Heidi? Do you compare how she is with how Peanut was? Every time I consider getting another dog, I think of what I'm still going through about Merlin and know I wouldn't (couldn't?) go through that again.
Sending you sincere and loving hugs,
Merlin'smum

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PeanutWee

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Reply with quote  #6 
Joanne, I'm sorry to hear that your roommate has cancer. It's very kind of you to take care of her Boston Terrier for her and surely it must ease her mind that he's being looked after. I send my best wishes for her health and recovery.

For months after Peanut went to the bridge, it would upset me to be around other dogs. There were also other things, and so we were not considering another. But I saw a photo of a little chi mix puppy at the shelter we donate to, and he reminded me of Peanut and I wanted to watch him play. At that moment though he was being adopted - his chi mix momma (Heidi) was there and she too reminded me of Peanut in gentle subtle ways. And Heidi was very sad, like me. I do believe Peanut led us to her.

Peanut will always be my bestest friend and soulmate. Heidi is a sweet little friend. I don't compare them to each other, but I appreciate and feel comforted by their differences and in the subtle ways Heidi reminds me of Peanut. But they are both their own unique little selves.

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jimmy17

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Reply with quote  #7 
Peanut`s Mom, I am sorry I have not posted sooner, but just want to say how very touching your post is on Peanut`s 15 months.   These milestones can be incredibly difficult - sometimes it can feel as if no time at all has passed, and other times it can feel like forever...    I have no doubts that sweet Peanut had a paw in sending little Heidi to you, and I am so happy she reminds you of Peanut - she was meant to be yours..

                                                                                                 Big Hugs to you, Peanut and Heidi

                                                                                                             Jackie xx

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J Taylor
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Reply with quote  #8 
Peanut's Mom,
These marker moments are so so difficult - we measure time so differently.   Our grief though is timeless...and the tears cried cannot be measured...Your 'bestest' friend is forever your 'bestest' friend.  Two hearts, one spirit and soul - forever and always your girl is looking out for her Mum - a guiding paw to little Heidi and perhaps even a whisper or two in Heidi's ears now and again.  As Jackie says 'Heidi was meant to be yours'...Peanut has chosen wisely.  Forever your two hearts are one...perhaps even now three hearts are tied together so so tightly - interwoven by love.
Grief is so incredibly powerful and at times it leads us to seek the 'understanding' of others and then at tother times it leads us to withdraw, to pull tightly all our memories, thoughts and emotions inside - to keep our special fur ones close - to close all the doors and windows into our sorrow.
May your sweet Peanut grace each day with her special touch and may each day bring a little extra light into your heart as little Heidi works the magic of puppy love.
Many hugs for you, and extra pets for your Heidi.
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MyBella

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Reply with quote  #9 
Hi Peanut's Mom,
 
Thinking of you and your adorable Peanut on this Peanut Monday.
No matter how much time goes by, your heart will always feel the emptiness left behind by your sweet girl, Peanut filled your days with so much love, so much fun and so many tender moments. 
Never worry about tears falling, your beautiful Peanut is worth each and every one that falls. Interestingly, tears actually have healing powers, hard to believe isn't it, but they actually help our bodies and mind heal each time they are released, and yes....they can be tiring as well.
 
I am so proud of you for opening your heart and home to beautiful Heidi, your Peanut is so proud of you too. I agree with you that your Peanut had a paw in leading you to Heidi, so beautiful.
 
Sending my warmest wishes for your wonderful heart to always know and feel the pure love and light that is your adorable Peanut, may each day bring the peace and healing you so deserve.
 
Please give my best wishes to your husband and family, you are all thought of often, especially on Peanut Monday.
 
Your Friend Always, Don

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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #10 
Hi Peanut's Mom,

I know what you mean when you say Peanut will always be your "bestest friend". I'm starting to make peace with the same idea. It hurts my heart, but it is comforting too in some ways.

Heidi is lucky to have such a kind soul to take care of her. Thank you for your words on Norm's thread. It means so much to hear from others who understand this grief, even after many months have passed.

Wishing you peace and healing,
Heather
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Molly_Beagle_Mom_4ever

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Reply with quote  #11 
Hi Peanut’s Mom, Just wanted to say hello to you, Heidi and your precious Peanut and let you know I am thinking about you. Peanut is so proud I’m sure that you brought Heidi into your loving home. She continues to be with you and share your love. I’ll miss you Monday night, so I wanted to wish you a beautiful week. Lots of hugs from Molly and me.

Molly’s Mom...Dawn xxxx

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Chinadoll

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Reply with quote  #12 
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers for Deborah and me. We are doing well. We left the home in Ala and came back to FL last week, we put the old home up for sale. We did so much work and are exhausted but the house looked so good. It was so hard for us to come to this decision, we had went to the home every summer for six years since Deborah had inherited it. Nicky and China Doll loved the trip and visiting there for the summer. Deborah's cousin left her the home when she passed away, Deborah was very close to her and had visited every year for a long time. She has so many memories there and it is emotional for her to let go of it. We just decided we cannot take care of two homes, too difficult. Coming back here to our home in FL after having been gone for 4 months, was so difficult. I miss my little angels every day, and coming back to an empty, too quiet home just brought back all the memories all over again. I guess this phase will never end. I hope you and Heidi are doing well, and I do appreciate the prayers. I think, for me, there is a point where you have to realize that this is as good as it gets. The grief will always be there, but so will the love. Take care and  blessings to you and Heidi and your precious angel Peanut.
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MyBella

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Reply with quote  #13 
Hi Peanut's Mom,
 
Your adorable Peanut is so proud of you for the way you opened your heart to Heidi and provided a new safe home for her. I agree with you in that Peanut had a huge part in connecting you and Heidi, your beautiful Peanut knew the perfect place for Heidi is with you, their wonderful, loving Mom.
 
Thank you so much for your messages, I truly and deeply appreciate you writing and keeping me updated, thank you, and you are right, the closeness with our girls will always be forever.
 
Give Heidi a big belly rub for me, tell her she needs to get her exercises in before I send treats. 
Sending my warmest wishes on this Peanut Monday, may your wonderful heart always feel the softness of your sweet girl's loving paws.
 
Your Friend Always, Don
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MyBella

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Reply with quote  #14 
Hi Peanut's Mom,
 
With the love of your adorable Peanut in your heart, I wish you a day full of the most wonderful and cherished memories on this Peanut Monday. May those memories and treasured moments provide you the strength, peace and healing you so deserve.
 
Hope Heidi is following her diet and knocking off those last two or three lbs, give sweet Heidi big belly rubs for me.
Sending my warmest wishes to you and your family.
 
Your Friend Always, Don
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Molly_Beagle_Mom_4ever

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Reply with quote  #15 
Hi Peanut’s Mom, Reading Don’s post above, I have to laugh a little after hearing that you saw your husband sneak a little bite of cheese to Heidi. Maybe if the last couple pounds aren’t coming off, it’s happening more often than you know :)

Thank you for your friendship and for sharing precious Peanut with all of us. Maybe Peanut has a little paw in nudging her daddy to give Heidi some extra treats. Always remember, Peanut is connected tightly to you forever, and the bond grows stronger and stronger. Hugs to you, Peanut and Heidi from Molly and me.

Molly’s Mom, Dawn xxxx

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